Judge — August 7, 1915 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

oat! Stories with Smiles -Fingered—At a dinner given by the Light iser of a little kingdom in Ruri- tania, a diplomat complained to his host that the minister of justice, who had been sitting on his left, had stolen his watch. — “Ah, he shouldn't have done that!"’ said the prime minister, in tones of annoyance. “[ will get it back for you."” Sure enough, toward the end of the even- ing, the watch was returned to its owner. “And what did he say?" asked the dip- orsh-h!" cautioned the host, glancing anxiously about him. ‘‘He doesn’t know that I have got it back.’’—Pittsburgh Chron- icle- Telegraph. Case of Necessity—Little Tommy had a very pretty sister. Pretty sister had a very devoted admirer. One evening, when the devoted admirer was sitting in the parlor waiting for sister to appear, he was ap- proached by little Tommy. “Say, Mr. Smith,"’ rather pointedly queried the youngster, “*do you love Sister Jenny?"’ “Why, Tommy!"’ was the amazed re- sponse of the blushing Mr. Smith. “‘Why do you ask me a question like that?"’ “Because,” was the quick rejoinder of the youngster, ‘‘she said last night that she would give five dollars to know, and I need the money.""—Philadelphia Telegraph. Something Strange—Lawyer—Were you acquainted with the deceased? Witness—Only in a business way. I was assistant in a large establishment at which the lady did much of her shopping. Lawyer—Did you in that capacity notice in her any signs of insanity? Witness—Well, no, not insanity exactly; merely eccentricity. I was in the thread department, and I have frequently seen her buy a spool of thread and carry it home herself." —Tit-Bits, Loyal to Home Town—A little girl in an east-side family has been hearing her par- ents discuss out-of-town buying, and their argument has been strongly for the trade- at-home policy. A mother who with her small son was visiting at the home last week from a neighboring city was surprised to hear the daughter of the house say to her offspring, **Don't try to hold my hand! I'll die an old maid before I'll marry an out-of-town man !'’— Independence (Kan.) Reporter. Why He Growled—‘‘The Browns have a new automobile.’’ “That so?"’ “Yes. Aren't you glad?” “‘T can't say that I am particularly.""" “You should rejoice in the success of others. I don’t see why men act so gloomy when other people are getting on."* “You don't? Well, I’m Brown's tailor, and he still owes me for two suits!""—De- i troit Free Press. Father Gasped—Supper was in progress, and the father was telling about a row which took place in front of his store that morning: “The first thing I saw was one man deal the other a sounding blow, and then a crowd gathered. The man who was struck Tan and grabbed a large shovel he had been using on the street and rushed back, his a (OF THE CONSTITUTION OF THE USA NOY ° 6. = e Pull Alexander Hamilton—Father of American Credit EL WEBSTER says of Hamilton: He smote the rock of TTT National resources and abundant streams of revenue gushed forth; : he touched the dead corpse of public credit and it sprung upon its feet? No man did more to build the Constitution of the United States than did Hamilton. He toc’ a prominent part in every debate and worked indefatigably on_ali the important committees. His genius, individuality and daring foresight are indelibly stamped upon every clause of our National Law— the law under which Americans are teed for all time Religious, Commercial and Personal Liberty. During Hamilton's life time he used his great influence to encourage and protect the brewing herons Among all the Fathers cf the Republic none knew better than t onestly-brewed barley-malt beers make for true temperance, This American Colossus, who was second enly to Washington in the service rendered his county, drank good beer all his le know of no one who has yet dared declare that it injured him in any way Under the tenets of the Constitution, which Hamilton did so much to make a fact, Anheuser-Busch 58 years ago launched their Sreat fe institution. During these years they have honestly brewed honest To-day 7500 people are daily rains to meet the public demand. Their Y orkt fathed brand B ER, because of its quality, purity, mildness and exquisite flavor, exceeds the sale of any cher bees by tnillions of bottles. ANHEUSER-BUSCH’ ST. LOUIS,USA. ‘Visitors to St.Louis are courteously invited to inspect our plant — covers 142 acres he tha PRESERVE YOUR COPIES OF JUDGE in a handsome binder which we offer you for $1.50, express collect. A bound file of JupGe is very ap- propriate for your library table and a atalltimes, Address HOTEL PURITAN COMMONTRALTH AVE. NOSTON, near Masarbavetis Ave. ear llaee an: tation The Distinctive Boston house Some globe trotter have enid that the Puritan {2 one of the most attractive and homelike hotels tu the world. Kingle rooms trom $2. Comblacd stttlag-ream. bed- room and bathroom from $4. Sell reatsined snlien. i] Your toquiries gladly anewered and source of plea JUDGE 225 FIFTH AVENUE, NEW YORK comicbooks.com