Judge, 1915-07-17 · page 17 of 28
Judge — July 17, 1915 — page 17: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**Top Image**: A formal wedding scene where the groom stands apart, unsmiling, while the bride and wedding guests appear celebratory. The caption references the marriage vow "with all my worldly goods I thee endow," suggesting the joke is about a groom's reluctance or unhappiness about financial obligations in marriage. **Three Humorous Anecdotes Below**: 1. **"A Monorail Ride"**: Satirizes a braggart named Buttinsky who claims to have ridden a monorail. Drummers (traveling salesmen) mock him by suggesting he rode a single rail carried by two men—implying his story is absurd and he's a chronic liar. 2. **"An Industrious Constable"**: An Ontario police officer receives mugshots of a criminal in different poses but interprets them as six different men, arresting five and pursuing a "sixth." The satire targets police incompetence. 3. **"After Service"** and **"Larger Sizes"**: Brief husband-wife jokes about cinema quality and dog prices—using spousal disagreement for humor. The page is early 20th-century satirical humor targeting vanity, dishonesty, and marital dynamics.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
if AND HE ALONE DOES NOT SMIL He—With all my worldly goods | thee endow A Monorail Ride UTTINSKY, who heard some traveling men talking about the monorail, adopted his usual tactics. “L rode on one of those once,” he piped in. **Rode on what?" “*A single rail.'" “I'll bet you did,’’ replied one of the drummers; ‘‘and I'll also bet there was a man carrying each end of the rail."* An Industrious Constable In a small Ontario town the con- stable received by post six ‘*Rogues’ Gallery’’ photos of an old offender taken in different positions. A fort- night later the constable sent this message to the city chief of police: ‘‘I have arrested five of the men and am going after the sixth to-night."* After Service Wife—I suppose you heard a moving discourse. Husband—Not so the film exchanges would notice it. LARGER SIZES IN PROPORTION He—Five hundred dollars for that runty little dog? It's ridiculous! She—I know it is; but you said we couldn’t afford an expensive one.