Judge, 1915-01-09 · page 9 of 24
Judge — January 9, 1915 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from Judge magazine contains multiple brief humorous items typical of early 20th-century American satire. **Main cartoon** ("Horseless Polo"): Shows people on motorcycles playing polo—a direct satire of modernization's absurdity. The joke mocks how new technology (motorcycles) is being retrofitted into traditional aristocratic sports, suggesting people blindly adopt novelties regardless of practicality. **Other humor items** include: - **"Grabbin' fo' Distance"**: A dialect-heavy anecdote with racist caricature of a Black witness whose description of retreating backward from gunfire uses exaggerated speech patterns for comedic effect—reflecting prevalent early-20th-century racial stereotyping in American humor. - **"The Drama's Trend"**: Satirizes theater's obsession with modernizing classics (updating Ben-Hur with motorcycles instead of chariots). - Various domestic humor snippets about courtship, children, and daily life. The page reflects Judge's formula: social commentary through exaggeration and ethnic/class-based humor typical of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
bride heard a final rule of guidance offered to her sex. “As our path in life is so narrow, we are justified in strewing it with flowers. At least, we should make the traveling easy."’ The sounds of soft music came from an adjoining room. Ata signal from the hostess, the ladies rose to practice the maxixe between the courses. The bride looked at her happy sisters. Throwing all doubts to the winds, she arose—converted—and circled merrily in and out among the dancers. Can’t Always Tell Which End Benefits Little Jane had been sewing fot her dolly for about an hour. Finally she looked up and said, ‘‘Mamma, don’t you know, i started to make dolly a pair of slippers, and they turned out to be a hat!"’ Midnight Debate Neutrality is jolted hard And gets a jar When felines gathered in the yard Discuss the war. A Pertinent Query “Mamma, when people are in mourning, do they wear black nightgowns?"" “Why, no, of course not.’” “Well, don’t they feel just asbad at night as they do in the daytime?" None So Blind “How is it I didn’t see you at the charity meeting last night?’ “It was I who passed the plate around !"* Repartee “Can you support a family?"’ The cautious father cried. “Tonly wanted Emily!"’ The suitor then replied. A Trick Worth While Uncle Ben Barnstraw's city nephew took him into a fire station one night just Nn nha EXCITING SPORTS--‘‘ HORSELESS POLO" in time to see the fire laddies shinning like squirrels down a pole from their quarters overhead. **Come on, uncle, we'll go to the fire,’’ the nephew suggested. “IT don’t want to go,’’ replied the uncle. ‘*I want to stay here until they come back, so I can see them scoot back up that pole again.”’ “‘Grabbin’ fo’ Distance’’ Booth Lowrey, southern lecturer, tells the following story from his personal observation: A very solemn colored minister was on the witness stand in a case dealing with an altercation and shooting fray be- tween two citizens of the town. “Did you see this trouble?’’ inquired the judge, sternly. **Yassah, jedge, I was dar when de tragedy commence."’ “*Will you tell the court just what happened?"’ **Well, jedge, yo’ honah, I cain’t jes’ 'zacly say what all happens. Yo’ see, I was only dar when de tragedy com- mence. When I sees dat dese two gemmans ain’ pleased wif one nuther, I begins a-ban- ishin’ away. En when I sees dey drawin’ dey pistols, I stahts advancin’ backwards. En when dey shoots, I jumps ovah de neahest fence and commence a-grabbin’ fo’ dis- tance!'’ —Stricktand Gillilan, Old Boreas He greets us with a bold wave, That knows no right or law; One day we have a cold wave, The next we have a thaw. The Drama’s Trend Tragedian—You tell me, sirrah, that I am behind the times? Manager—Yes. Youcome with me. I’m going to pro- duce a modern version of “*Ben-Hur,"’ with motor cy- cles for the principals in the chariot race. comicbooks.com