Judge — October 31, 1914 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE MODERN WOMAN and Cress PEYSER Mustard By ETHEL k. you women are so tender, You women are so frail, You really haven't strength enough to vote; But go out and tend the harvest, Go out and run the trams! Of course you've plenty strength for this, we note. WOMEN: Is the ballot very heavy? Is the ballot very large? Is the ballot any bigger than a hor: Do you have to use a derrick? Do you lift it with a probe? Or do you use some strange, magnetic force? Absolutely Truc She had served as a wit- ness against a woman who was very evidently trying to get money out of a traction company on ac- count of some trumped-up injuries. She left the courtroom very positive that the wom- an would lose the case, as she had noted very car fully the adverse cros: questionings and the pal- pable weakness of the woman's defense. Many weeks elapsed. She ‘had not heard the verdict. One day, as she alighted from the elevator of the building in which she plied her trade, she was greeted by a man. “How do you do, miss? I am the fore- man of the jury for the case in which you were a witness,’" “Yes id she inquiringly. “Did you know that the woman won her case?”’ “You don't mean it! could she?’’ “Oh, well, the jury felt sorry for her."” “And men are not swayed by their emotions,"’ said she. How in the world Onc Luxury Left Hubby—Now, don’t get angry, dear. It doesn’t pay. Wifey—I certainly do enough things I hate without pay! Kindly let me keep the luxury of getting angry! . Suffrage Snapshots By IDA HUSTED HARPER T say that show a steady increase in the size of women’s waists. In that case something should be done to bring about a steady increase in the length of men’s arms. But, even so, one cannot associate the waist of a Venus de Milo with a clinging vine mnasium statistics A Chicago girl swam two miles to shore from an overturned boat, dragging her escort, who couldn't swim. Now the delicate question arises, Which shall do the proposing? “Behind the skirts of suffragism, an othcial statement of the anti Tear rst Ho tezean on auncnen oor Curbside Comments By OREOLA W. HASKELL The New Lover E LOOKS with scorn adown the years, At all the long line of his peers. “Kings throned on hearts,'’ the poet’s praise, He brands as false—a foolish phrase. “For, lo!" he cries, “with gifts of price You did weak woman's heart entice. Gold, rank and home to her you bore. Did these or you allure her more? As serf, she lifted slavish eyes; Fettered and kept from high emprise, ‘Through man alone she haply rose. Her love, if feigned or felt, who knows? But I a nobler passion wake, For only one great gift 1 make— The gift of love; with conscious pride, She wins herself all else beside. Uncurbed and strong, her heart knows naught Of lures that tempt it to be bought. And so I glory o’er you all, Nor feel the doubts that must appall. For well | know her heart comes fre Her eyes se love and me. Feminine Fibbers AN ACTRESS taking the part of a wife lying to protect those she loved, wheninterviewed andasked whether she thought women were natural liars, replied that they are forced into de- naught but mintasy ten sere SOME OF THE FOOL THINGS THEY TRY TO PUT OVER ON US monism goes to the polls, socialism marches red and rampant on the streets, and feminism stalks and swaggers in our homes.’’ The old-fashioned thing — to wear skirts so wide as all that! “Suffrage was begotten in Utah and Idaho, by Mormonism,”’ says a syndicate article sent forth by the Pennsylvania anti association. Oh, no; it was ‘‘be- gotten’ in Wyoming, when there wasn’t a Mormon in the Territory. The manager of a large school for the athletic training of girls says he has a number of pupils who can ‘‘heave a weight one hundred and eighty feet.’’ It almost seems that if women can do that, they ought to have the physical strength to heave a ballot into a box ception on account of their dependence on men. The attempt to manage some man on whose favor her liv- ing depends often drives a woman to deception, her maternalism leading to the protection of those in trou- ble rouses her to prevarication, and soci- ety requiring her to be always attractive and entertaining forces her to assume a role instead of acting natural. To all this woman must plead guilty; but, while the feminist desires to replace the fear of hubby or a boss with a straightforward independence that will scorn flattery or falsehood, the old-time-clinger believes in letting the female tongue wag as it listeth. And, indeed, what a gray world it will be when fibbers are no more! Many a gallant now puffed with the con- ceit engendered by a sweet female voice will go down the pike shrunk and shaken and cowed by the weight of a modesty he had never thought to have thrust upon him. comicbooks.com