Judge, 1914-09-12 · page 7 of 24
Judge — September 12, 1914 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct humorous pieces typical of early 20th-century Judge magazine: **Top Cartoon:** "Hint to Unexpected Guests—Bring Your Own Provisions" satirizes uninvited visitors by showing a chaotic domestic scene where unexpected guests arrive with their own belongings, creating household disruption. **Middle Story:** A brief anecdote from Polkville, Arkansas, humorously documents a cook accidentally scalding a foreign visitor with boiling water. The joke relies on the premise that since he's a foreigner who can't communicate complaints, "no particular harm was done"—satirizing indifference to immigrant mistreatment. **Bottom Section:** Two short pieces—"A Dire Threat" (about a small man threatening to release a hot-air balloon), and "Force of Habit" (a poem about a woman asking if her petticoat shows when she's wearing none). These exploit slapstick logic and Victorian modesty conventions for humor. The page exemplifies Judge's satirical approach: poking fun at social situations, domestic life, and human behavior through exaggeration and irony.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
TUCeE Se HINT TO UNEXPECTED GUESTS—BRING YOUR OWN PROVISIONS voice. The imp was inside the room. Love was on the window ledge. The young wife swept toward the door. Her hands were clasped on her heaving bosom. “The fatal flaw—the heel of Achilles!'’ she moaned. “Hold He, too, was on his feet. ‘‘What’s this? Jit 5 ing’?. ~~ You're going’’—— WS ““Forever!"* “Because some other woman darned my socks?'? “Because she pre-empted the place that should have been saved, inviolate, for me. Those who labor without money and with- out price’’—— He stopped her with a gesture. ‘‘Not so fast! There was no especial—er—er —appropriation—that’s true. But why don’t you ask me who she was?” “T don’t care! I won't care! I won't’ —- “But you bull listen? That good angel of a bachelor’s socks was’’—— She put her fingers to her ears—very ate Then she fought temptation and lost. “She—she was’’— The words were forced from her lips. “The washerwoman—she threw in the mending.”’ There was compelling truth in his voice, in his smile, in his outstretched arms. Love scrambled back through the win- dow; the imp sprained an ankle in his dive for the door. “Oh!” gasped the young wife, as the man’s arms closed about her. From the Polkville(Ark.) Weekly Clarion The cook at the Palace Hotel, a most estimable and accomplished lady, flung a vessel of boiling water out of a side win- dow of that well-known inn yesterday, with the intention of scalding some pred- atory hogs, and threw the greater portion of the steaming liquid on an innocent by- stander, who was sitting in the shade. However, as the gentleman was some sort of a foreigner, whose language could not be translated by the lady, no particu- lar harm was done. Notwithstanding ball players are manly fellows they often deliver a foul blow. A Dire Threat A’ A county fair in a small inland city several hundred men were engaged in holding down a large balloon which was rapidly being inflated with hot air. The smallest man of the lot looked about him nervously, and then yelled at the top of his voice, “Hey, come and take my place, somebody! I’ve got to go!"” No one paid any atten- tion to him. A few moments later the little man bawled, “If somebody don’t come and take my place right away, I'm going to let the old thing go up!”” Force of Habit “John, dear, does my petticoat show?"’ She murmured, when ready to go. As they should long since have been gone, John answered impatiently, ‘‘No.’" Then she blushed a deep pink, For she happened to think That she had no petticoat on. comicbooks.com