Judge, 1914-07-04 · page 11 of 24
Judge — July 4, 1914 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several satirical pieces typical of early 20th-century American humor: **Top cartoon ("Puzzle—Whose Turn Is It to Wash the Dishes?")**: Shows camping scenes illustrating domestic role confusion—likely satirizing the emerging feminist movement by suggesting women's traditional household duties (dishwashing) are unavoidable even in leisure settings. **"Oh, Mighty Me!"**: A poem mocking intellectual pretension and name-dropping—the speaker boasts of knowing all great literature and famous people, yet ironically nobody knows *him*. It's satire of self-important bluffing. **"An Old-fashioned Idea"**: Joshua Oldstock claims the best feminism is a woman "darnin' a sock and rockin' a cradle"—conservative mockery of the "new feminist movement" by romanticizing traditional domesticity. **"The Spectrum of Civilization"** and **"The Reason"**: Brief satirical lists and jokes about contemporary society and human nature. **"The Ostrich"**: A man hiding to avoid a creditor, illustrating debt avoidance through cowardice. Overall, the page reflects Judge's satirical stance on feminism, pretension, and social change circa 1910s-1920s.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Ss Oh. Mighty Me! EN HAVE no shame. a game on Fame. I base my claim to same upon my name And what I know. And so my horn I blow, Although, by nature mod- est, I go slow. Some frame What Shakespeare knew I've pondered through; I know his every line. On Dante, too, my man- hood grew; His knowledge vast is mine, Keats, Shelley, Scott and all that lot Were gifted more or less; But they had not a thought, God wot! That I do not possess. I know each word and silence heard By Marlowe's audience, And that which stirred the baneful bird Of Coleridge penitence; The work of all who've heard the call Of Genius I have scanned, From Adam's fall to recent scrawl, And have at my command. Why, I must be of high degree! For all which mankind knew— From start to me, collectively— Iknow. Big boast, but true! And to the shame of those of faine I add a single line: I know, I claim, each big man’s name, But none of them knew mine! —A. Walter Utting. PUZZLE—WHOSE An Old-fashioned Idea «| TELL you,’’ said Joshua Oldstock, “this here new feminist movement ain’t goin’ to pan out. The only femi- nist movement that ever was any’ good was the one we had when I was a young man.’’ “Why,” his grandniece replied, ‘there was no such thing os a feminist move- ment when you were a young man!"” “There wa'n't, eh? That’s all you know about it. The greatest feminist movement in the world is a good, sensible woman darnin’ a sock and rockin’ a cradle with her foot."" The Spectrum of Civilization White slaves. Yellow journals. Pink sporting sheets. Red-light districts. Green ruralites. Blue devils. Dark-brown tastes. Black despair. The Reason Willis — Then you think Bump left considerable life insurance? Gillis—Yes. The agent was the first one to propose to the widow. TURN IS IT TO WASH THE DISHES? What Baseball Means to Them THE housewife—A soup cooler. The small boy—A slightly better profession than piracy. Congress—‘‘No quorum,’” I'he knocker—Hammer practice. The magnate—$$$$$$3$$$. The fan—Life. The office bby—Grandmother plague. The umpire—Pop bottle target practice. The player—Oslerization at thirty. The sporting writer—Enrichment of the slanguage. Stuart B, Stone. THE OSTRICH “" Why are you puffing like a steam engine and raising that cloud of smoke ?'’ “ Sh-b-h! don't want him to see me."” There's a man over there I owe money and I comicbooks.com