Judge, 1914-06-27 · page 15 of 25
Judge — June 27, 1914 — page 15: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page combines baseball humor, children's witticisms, and social satire typical of early 20th-century Judge magazine. **"Baseball Slanguage"** offers humorous definitions of baseball terminology—a sport at peak cultural prominence. References like "Tyrus Raymond Cobb" (famous Detroit Tigers player) and "Honus Wagner" (Pittsburgh Pirates legend) anchor the jokes for contemporary readers obsessed with baseball statistics and players. **"Wit of Children"** presents anecdotes where children's literal interpretations expose adult absurdities—a child asking if a dead man went "subway or elevated," or a girl dismissing Eden because "They had to move out!" (implying Adam and Eve relocated). **"Grace After Meals"** cartoon shows well-dressed gentlemen at an upscale restaurant, satirizing pretentious dining etiquette. The **limericks and verses** mock contemporary social types: gamblers, remarried widows, spinsters, and fashion-conscious young men—standard targets of period satire emphasizing propriety and respectability. Throughout, the humor assumes educated, urban readership familiar with baseball, current events, and conventional social expectations.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
From the Baseball Slanguage XISTENCE — October-to-April monot- ony, as opposed to real life, which is enjoyed from April to October. Zero—A freeze mark which chills the hearts of the fans when suspended on the scoreboard after the home team has batted. Zing !—A musical sound produced by passing a wil- low wand across the nose of a horsehide. Zowie!—A base note. Raw deal—A called strike not served over the pan and which therefore requires roasting. Recruit—A .484 batter in Oshkosh, an -084 performer in Gotham. Retirement—An annual fall perform- ance by Honus Wagner, in the way of a tragedy for the Pittsburgh fans. Bat—A means of introduction to the baseball .400. Bug —One who tears through the latest congressional investigation, Mexican war, Newport scandal, Wall Street flurry and Chinese murder, in order to find out whether Tyrus Raymond Cobb is. still lambasting the pill for .376. Casey—Leading whiffer in the Poetical League. Some people entertain a thought long enough to give it ennui. Stuart I. Stone. Wit of Children ELIZABETH was very much inter- ested in the various modes of travel in New York, especially in the extremes of subway and elevated. One day she was questioning Miss A., her governess, about the latter’s father. “T haven’t any father, dear; he died and went away from us.” The three-year-old was greatly inter- ested. ‘Which way did he go—hubw or elevated?”’ Miss A. hoped that he chose the upper route! A little Kansas boy had been shut off from his fellow-creatures for some time on account of whooping cough, and life was growing very monotonous. One day he said to his mother, ‘‘Mamma, do you know what I wish I was?’’ “‘No, my son. What is it?’’ “Well, I just wish I was two little dogs, for then I could play with myself.’’ Passing through a forlorn little town in Lie. Scnmeres GRACE AFTER MEALS Jones—And you Agent—Well, there’ s safe was burglar proof ! your proof of burglars ! Florida, the name of the station was no- ticed as Eden. A little daughter, not yet five, was called. ‘Come here, Dolly. This is Eden; perhaps we shall see Adam and Eve.’” Much disgusted by such ignorance, she retorted, ‘Why, no, daddy! They had to move out!"" Katharine W. Hand. Locoed Limericks Good Riddance r WAS down on the Island of Coney, A youth bet his roll on a pony; When he lost every scad, He remarked, “‘[ am glad, For the money I wagered was phony.’’ The Dear Departed There was an old chap in Sal'na, Who married a widow named Dinah; She talked of her dead Till it went to his head, And now he is living in China. The Humorous Spinster There was an old maid in New York, Who always ate soup with a fork; And when she was done, In a spirit of fun, She plugged up her throat with a cork. People Will Talk There was a young man of Key West, Who put on his shoes and his vest; Said his two maiden aunts, “If you don’t wear your pants, Folks will say you're not stylishly dressed.’” —Walt Mason The Agricultural Idea Silas—What’s your son studying at college? Hiram—Pharmacy. Silas—Some newfangled farming, eh? By Their Clothes Shall Ye Know The apparel oft proclaims the man, but the present styles show up the women. comicbooks.com