Judge — June 13, 1914 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Passing, the Mustard Suspicion —‘‘Fred, do you remember where you were in 1910?” asked the bride of a few months. “Why, no, dear; I don’t remember exactly,’’ replied the young husband, “Why do you ask?”’ “Why, I was reading to-day in the paper that it is said that in 1910 one per- son in every eight hundred in the United States was in prison.’’ —- Birmingham Age-Herald. The Difference—‘‘Father used to have to hurry through his work in order to get to the golf links in the afternoon,”’ said Maymie. “Yes,”’ replied Maude; ‘‘and now he has to hurry away from the dancing party inorder to get his breakfast and go to work in the morning.’’— Washington Star. Two Girls—Kitty—Jack told me last night that I was the prettiest girl he'd ever seen. Ethel—Oh, that’s nothing! the same to me a year ago. Kitty—1 know that; but as one grows older, one’s taste improves, you know.— Milwaukee News. He said Indefinite—‘*What time will this train teach Perkins Junction?’’ asked a trav- eler on a short-line railroad in Missouri. “There ain't no telling,’’ said the con- ductor affably. ‘‘Me and the engineer are going ter get off down the road a piece and hunt rabbits for a spell. Baltimore Sun. Easily Suited—‘‘Is that Ella's hus- band?” “Yes."" “He must be easily suited."” “Easily suited! Say, that fellow would take a round trip ina street car just for the ride.’’—Cleveland Plain Dealer. Industrious—‘*He’s never made any ef- fort to support himself.’’ “Oh, yes, he has! To my certain knowledge, he’s proposed to every girl with money he knows.’’— Baltimore American. Interference — Magistrate — Can't this case be settled out of court? Mulligan—Shure! That's phat we wuz thryin’ to do, yer honor, wkin the polis interfered.—Brooklyn Life. A Day's Outing — Mrs. Hiram Offen (seeking a cook)—My home is in the country. I hope that is no objection. Cook—No, mum; I Il enjoy a day in the country.—Santa Cruz Surf. Under Control—Patice—He says his books are his best friends. Patrice—But he’s forgetting the ladies. Patience—Oh, no, he’s not. He says he can shut the books up when he gets tired.— Yonkers Statesman. 1000 Island House ALEXANDRIA BAY Jefferson County New York IN THE HEART OF THE THOUSAND ISLANDS In the most enchanting spot in all America, where nature's charms are rarest, all the de- lights of modern civilization are added in the 1,000 Island House. No hotel of the Metrop- olis provides greater living facilities or such luxurious comfort—real HOME comfort—as does this palatial Summer retreat. An amusement for every hour, or quiet, complete rest, is the choice of every guest. All Drinking Water Used in the House Is Filtered Send two ¢cent stamps for Mlustrated Booklet O. G. STAPLES, Proprietor WILLIAM WARBURTON, Mer. Apollinaris “THE QUEEN OF TABLE WATERS.” the safe and HOTEL IMPERIAL ROBERT STAFFORD Broadway and 32d Street, New York Dancing in the Palm Garden Daily (except Sunday) From 4 to 6.30 P. M. and 10 P. M. to 1, under the supervision of Mr. G, Hep- burn Wilson, M. B., whose assistants t to dance with are pre: guests upon request. COPELAND TOWNSEND, Manager You AreGoing Abroad By what steamship line? At what pier? On what day? What will it cost? How about baggage? What hotels will you use abroad? What are their tariffs? Can you be certain of their accommodations? Let Us Answer These Questions For You Railway, hotel and steamship accommodations form only one_department of Free service offered by the Traveler's Bureau of the HOTEL MALPIN Broadway & 34% St..New York Eve oper matters, customs houte and itinerary, necessary tothe enjoyment trig i fotk, ie attended to ry detail of baggage, mon to Europe abd while visit tobe Peerciete Barca” —and your wants—we will attend to Management of MERRY & BOOMER ‘Write or telegraph the date of your arrival in New York will them. comicbooks.com