Judge, 1914-05-09 · page 11 of 25
Judge — May 9, 1914 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**Top Cartoon**: "Continually Engaged at Home" depicts a vaudeville manager (Smith) approaching men in formal dress—likely representing wealthy or prominent figures—with a business proposition. The caption reveals he's wired someone (presumably a performer named Huerta, referenced as needing money) offering "$1,000 a week for twenty weeks" with "no answer." The satire mocks both desperate job-hunting and the dismissive attitudes of the powerful toward such pleas. **Text Content**: The page contains light satirical verse and humorous observations—a poem mocking men's pickiness about hosiery quality, a joke about suburbanites' competitive gossip, rural character sketches poking fun at small-town postmasters and their provincial opinions, and a Western tall tale about a trapper's wooden-legged horse that "changed the railroad map." The final panel jokes about "The High Cost of Living," showing the economic pressure on households choosing between luxuries (bonnets) and necessities (eggs)—a contemporary concern during economic uncertainty.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
CONTINUALLY ENGAGED AT HOME Jones—Huerta needs money. My Hosiery HE socks I get from thee, dear heart, ap, Are made, indeed, for churls —not me. Though the seams look good, they rip apart— My hosiery! My hosiery! Nor is my taste for Alice blue, Cerise and color gayety, But for a quiet or somber hue In hosiery! My hosiery! I have no use for fancy braid, And polka dots are rot to me; For I only want the plainest made In hosiery! My hosiery! I know you do your best to try And please the manly heart of me; But, my dear, I ask, just let me buy My hosiery! My hosiery! William J. Fielding. What Might Have Been First suburbanite—Do you enjoy going into Newcome’s wonderful garden? Second suburbanite—No; everything in it is so exasperatingly perfect that I can’t have the fun of saying, ‘‘If you had followed my advice, it would have been better.’" Smith (vaudeville manager)—Impossible! weeks, and received no answer! No Matter Whose ! Hickville postmaster (discussing affairs of state)—Now, what do you think of our foreign relations, Ezry? Prominent lounger (warmly)—I think they should be barred out uv this here country if they can’t read an’ write! Speaking Right Up “Who could paint her charms?” the poet cries. “She does herself,’’ her chum replies. The Common Habit Many are called, but few fail to take another nap. Trapper Seth's Wooden-legged Horse By ARTHUR CHAPMAN ‘ HERE ain't nothin’ so humble,’’ said Chuckwagon Cal, as he stood at the tailboard of the mess wagon mixing biscuit for the cow-punchers, ‘‘but what Providence can make use of it as an instru- ment of vengeance. There's old Trapper Seth Terwiliger’s three-legged horse, for instance. That horse, barrin’ hav- in’ a wooden leg, didn’t look out of the ordinary wall-eyed pinto stock; but he changed the railroad map of this country, I wired him an offer of a thousand a week for twenty jest the same. Trapper Seth come out to the Rocky Mountain country when Kit Carson was jest a baby-show ex- hibit and Jim Bridger was in short pants. He introduced more whiskey and poker to Injuns than any other white Tinirs on THE HIGH COST OF LIVING “Well, my dear, we must choose between a new bonnet’ for you'and eggs for breakfast, We can’t have both.” comicbooks.com