Judge — April 11, 1914 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

tion. The triangular charm was broken. She was bowing to a kiddish young fel- low, dressed in the latest syllables of fashion as fashion is translated by the young collegian; and he came up with all a college kid’s confidence. “Oh, dear, I can’t go, you know!” said Amelia, in an aside to Delia. And she introduced Mr. Horace Birch to Delia and Lelia and went away with him. And the morning papers said that Miss Amelia Cranver had eloped with Mr. Birch, adding that she was a junior and he a freshman at Hornell The Boston Prof There was a prof. from Bosting, A most punctilious jay, Who in a desert wide and warm Sat down to lunch one day. And to the food familiar, oh! He doffed his hat; but when He found how well his bean was baked, His hat went on again. Any Time Nell--Eliza went to an astrologer to find out when was the best time to get married. Stell—-What did he tell her? Nell --He took one look’ at her and told her to grab her first chance. LENTEN REJUVENATION Mrs. Revere—You say you feel much bene- fited by the Lenten season, my dear? irs. Gailyfe—Yes. You see we all went to Balm Peach, and I tangoed off fifteen pounds. Silhouettes ND NOW a man in New York has sug- gested that sleepers be attached to subway trains. This is easily understood, as the news item goes on to explain that the person making the suggestion is a Brooklyn man. So strong is the grip of habit. The other day in Rockford, Illinois, Amelia Jouzupicuitis and Anatas Zuza- wicuis were united in the bonds of holy matrimony. Several times during the ceremony beads of perspiration were ob- served to start from the clergyman’s brow, and a couple of guests near the chancel rail say that he consulted notes. a Again it has happened. A New Jersey woman hid $140 in the ash pan of her stove, and in a moment of absentminded- ness started a wood fire. She is now anxiously waiting word from Washing- ton to see if she can get any spring clothes, She must be some relation to the man who hunts for a gas leak with a lighted match. Only the remains from the lat- ter accident don’t have to be sent to Washington—they can be looked after locally. —Homer Croy. Fate HE moving van moves on, and, having moved, Departs along a highway torn and grooved, You seek your new abode; three hours go by. The moving van, alas! has not arrooved! Taking His Cue A small street urchin from the ci who was spending some time ina fres air camp, was the source of considerable entertainment to members of the family at a farm where he frequently called for milk and apples. Whaddye think about the youngster, anyhow?” the farmer asked his wife, one e's a nice little fellow,’’ the wife replied; ‘‘but I can’t just make him out.” “How make him out?” very time grampaw sneezes ‘Isch!" that boy allus laughs and yells, ‘Ka Bib- ble"? Impromptu Gush of Sympathy “Sometimes,’’ reflected the elderly dame, ‘‘a man weeps at the wedding of a daughter, because he suddenly realizes what a mean husband he has been to his own wife and is overcome when he thinks of what may be ahead of the girl.’” ENGAGED ‘The way it feels the first time she wears the ring. comicbooks.com