Judge, 1914-04-04 · page 9 of 24
Judge — April 4, 1914 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes medical practice during the Wilson era ("King Woodrow"). The biblical-style parable mocks a young doctor who initially practices honest medicine but fails financially because wealthy female patients don't return for repeat visits. An older, successful physician reveals the secret: wealthy women seeking medical attention don't want truth—they want *attention*. The young doctor adopts this approach, prescribing expensive placebos (sugar pills) and recommending luxurious spa treatments instead of actual treatment. He becomes wealthy and corrupt. The satire targets two things: (1) doctors who exploit hypochondriac wealthy women by offering unnecessary expensive "treatments," and (2) patients' own complicity in preferring comforting lies to medical honesty. The moral ("the public gets what it wants") suggests both doctors and patients deserve each other. The top cartoon depicts Atlantic City's boardwalk scene unrelated to the main story.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
1 WHILE yet King Woodrow ruled * over the people, a certain young man went forth from the place where physicians are taught and betook him unto a city, saying, 2. Verily, I have stud- ied long and diligently and spent much gold gain- ing wisdom in my calling. Now I will heal the sick and lame and get me great riches and high repute among men. . 3. Whereupon he sought out a room near the marketplace and hung out a shingle to proclaim his calling. 4. And in due season it came to pass that the sick came to him for counsel, and many were healed and went upon their way rejoicing. 5. And it came to pass that many women with gold ornaments and pleasing incense came to seek his counsel and be healed of divers things. 6, But with one accord they came not the second time unto him. 7. Whereupon he mourned exceedingly, for he said unto himself, Alas and alas! Without the favor of the rich ones, I can never gain either wealth or high repute. 8. And he sought an elder doctor, sor- rowing, and spake unto him, saying, 9. Behold, thou art high in favor of these wealthy dames, and they bestow much fees upon thee, while I, who excel ON THE ATLANTIC CITY BOARDWALK—THE AUTO ROLLING CHAIR IS HERE Parables of Pifflicus Of the Doctor Who Got Wisc By W. KEE MAXWELL thee in knowledge, get but a single whack at them, and they return no more. 10, And the elder physician winked the other eye, saying, 11. Much learning hath made thee mad. Remember that when a woman sayeth she is iJl, she desireth not the truth, but much attention. 12. And it came to pass that when next a rich woman called upon the young physician, he rebuked her not, saying, A few nights’ sleep and a cup of hot water before breakfast will restore thee. 13. Nay, he shook his head sadly and gave her many pills of dough and sugar, saying, 14. Get thee to another clime and take thine ease among the palms, and keep thy body supple by much dancing and bathing on the beach. 15. And, behold, she show- ered much gold upon him and signed him for her family doc- tor by the year. 16. And likewise it befell with many more who came, until the young man waxed fat and gouty with much practice. 17. And he reflected often, saying within himself, Verily, it is not only the showmongers that fain must give the public what it wants. Selah. Volunteers “Watch your step, miss,’’ cautioned the conductor on one of the higher-up cars. “It isn’t necessary !'’ snapped the in- coming passenger. ‘‘That bunch of sap- heads on the curb is doing it for me.”” A SIGN OF SPRING comicbooks.com