Judge, 1914-02-14 · page 23 of 24
Judge — February 14, 1914 — page 23: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is primarily an **advertising page** from Judge magazine, with small humorous anecdotes interspersed. The main illustrated content is a poem titled "Shear Steal: His Middle Name," which celebrates an unnamed everyman character whose defining trait is optimism and cheerfulness (his "middle name is Boost"). The satire appears gentle—mocking neither the character nor boosterism itself, but rather celebrating the social value of positive thinking and encouragement during hard times. The poem advocates for practical optimism: promoting your cause, supporting friends, and discouraging complainers. The remaining text consists of brief jokes about travel mishaps, legal strategy, marital life, and children's innocent logic—typical light humor from the era. The advertisements promote whiskey, hotels, soap, and a dubious "make $25 a day" business scheme, reflecting early-twentieth-century print media conventions.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Home after dreary tramping through rain and wind. Guard against chills and colds with a glass of warming, comforting OldOverholt Rye “Same for 100 Years” A pute, mellow whiskey godered by five generations of physicians because of ita uniformity ead ex- cellence, Distilled and bottled in bond. A. OVERHOLT & CO. Pittsburgh, Pa. 11TH STREET AND UNIVERSITY PLACE ‘One Block West of Broadway NEW YORK CITY Close to Wholesale and Retail Dry Goods Districts, Railroad and Steamship Lines MODERN ABSOLUTELY FIREPROOF 300 Rooms (200 with Bath) RATES $1.00 PER DAY UP Excellent Restaurant and Cafe Moderate Prices Send for tree illustrated Guide and Map of New York City “The Hotel of American Ideals.” Hotel Powhatan WASHINGTON, D. C, New—Fireproof. European Plan. Pennsylvania Ave., at 18th and H Streets, within walking distance of shops, theatres and public buildings. Overlooks the White House. Rooms, detached bath, $1.50, $2 up. ‘coms, private bath, $2.50, $3 up. Restaurant a In Carte, Palm Court, Ame-iean Indian Grill, Tea Room, nd Pip» Organ, Orchestra, Write for Souvenir Booklet, with Map. ‘Ask for special itinerary for Bridal Couples, Conven- tions, Tourist Parties, Schools and Colleges. CLIFFORD M. LEWIS, Mgr. Shear Steal His Middle Name He isn’t handsome—far from that, As manly beauty goes; He doesn’t sport the latest hat Or up-to-datest clothes. And yet he is more popular Than all the blooming roost, And ev’rybody likes him, for His middle name is Boost. He doesn’t wear the latest styles Or know the latest fad; But he just smiles and smiles and smiles When things are going bad. He talks a lot, when rainclouds pour, Of crops they have produced; He sees their silver lining, for His middle name is Boost. He makes no million bucks a year, And yet he has enough; His charity is giving cheer When things are looking tough. Of friends he owns a plenty, more Than money has induced; Yep, ev’rybody likes him, for His middle name is Boost. Get out yourself and boost a bit And jolly folks along, For knocking never makes a hit When things are breaking wrong. If you should hear a kicker roar, Just bump him off the roost, And show the folks you’re plugging for Your middle name is Boost. —Douglas Malloch, in American Lumber- man. . Hard Luck—Two New Yorkers of some experience in travel other than by the rapid-transit lines of the metropolis were telling hard-luck stories. “About the worst I ever got up against,’’ said one, ‘‘was buying from a Connecticut Yankee what was represented to be a pullet, and, by gravy! it turned out to be ahen so old she couldn’t lay fresh eggs.’” “Hard lines, hard lines!’’ sighed the other, who had a red nose. ‘‘But think of me being marooned for a whole month in a Kansas town which was so teetotally temperance that even the cows had gone dry at the last election !’’—New York Sun. One Editor’s Idea—Be sure you are wrong, retain the best legal talent avail- able, then go ahead.— Contact (Nev.) Miner. His Exercise—‘‘Get any exercise while you were away?’’ “Plenty of it. My wife dressed four times a day, and I did the buttoning for her.’’—Louisville Courier-Journal. Out of the Mouths of Babes Mamma—Now, Ida, you should be po- lite and offer grandma a share of your birthday candy. Ida—I would, mamma, if I was sure she’d be polite and not take any. “How far back can you remember, El- mer?’’ asked the inquisitive caller. “Oh, ever so far!’’ replied the little fellow. ‘‘I can remember when I was so little that I couldn’t remember anything.” —Chicago News. Vaseline Reg. U. S, Pat. OF, Hair Tonic A health-giving dressing to the scalp. Prevents dandruff and fall- ing of the hair, Gets right down to the roots and gives just the necessary moisture needed to keep the hair in perfect condition. For sale everywhere or Send 10c for trial size. CHESEBROUGH MFG. COMPANY Consolidated 1734 State Street New York The skin welcomes Pears’ Soap. It gently cleanses, fresh- ens and beautifies. Never ir- ritates nor acts harshly. Have you used Pears’ Soap ? Get it anywhere, Make $25 a Day—Be Your Own Boss You can easily do it with our wonderful new invention. Every dime you take in, you make 8 net profit. The DIAMOND POST CARD GUN asomeinde amd tum paeten& Sra ce ase od lone dry ploes oe SD wn Jove ick the Balt ana Deliver to Ficeare tates one elnate™ it's cory TUG MONET awaits you et Beatbons Parse. Pare, Ta NNotaverioare beaded. end for FREE Te _EARLINGTON 27th Street, West of Broadway NEW YORK EUROPEAN PLAN @ A Step from Broadway. @ Absolutely Fireproof. @ Quiet as a Village at Night. q Your Comfort Our Aim Always. Parlor, Bedroom and Bath, front of house, one person, $2.50; two people, $3.50. Why yy more when our service is equalled only G the best? SINGLE ROOMS, $1.00 E,W. WARFIELD, - - Manager In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE, It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com