Judge, 1914-01-03 · page 7 of 24
Judge — January 3, 1914 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical pieces mocking early 20th-century attitudes: **"The Car They Promised" cartoon**: The top illustration depicts a couple waiting at "Reliable Auto Repair Company" for their car—promised a week ago but still unrepaired. The satire targets the unreliability of early automobile repair shops, a common frustration of the era. **"Woman—1914 Model" advertisement parody**: The text humorously presents women as consumer products, using automotive sales language ("options," "models," "speed"). It satirizes both the commodification of women and the era's anxieties about women's independence—describing the "1914 model woman" as faster, harder to control, and requiring more fuel than previous versions. The joke critiques both misogyny and changing gender roles. **"For Furious Walking" dialogue**: This mocks overzealous traffic enforcement by depicting a magistrate charging a pedestrian with "walking at a furious rate" without a light, while casually admitting he's "mashed" pedestrians with his motorcar. The satire exposes the absurdity of blaming pedestrians rather than dangerous drivers. All three pieces lampoon modern technology's social disruptions.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
kt Cae, Beran =e Soar nese Y Ane BMA \ k ! i / | b T Ava) WEVAIE CO THE CAR THEY PROMISED YOU TO HAVE REPAIRED A WEEK AGO Woman—1914 Model! THE 1914 model woman will surpass all previous models yet produced. This is absolutely guaranteed. Men should place their options at once, for, although the supply is not strictly limited, those who make a quick choice will naturally secure the best-looking road companions. Only one to a customer, although those who make a selection which proves un- satisfactory may later have a second choice, after lawfully disposing of the first one. The 1914 model will be very graceful, with slim body, well curved, so as to at- tract immediate attention. She will be ous model, but will make up for this in speed. Owners should put on the brakes very frequently, however, for if she once exceeds the limit, it will be very hard to keep her within the lawful speed there- after. There will be several colors to choose from. The very light shade with yellow top and the dark models with brown and black tops will prevail. Both should be handled carefully. Owners should bear in mind that the 1914 model will be very apt to skid if the road isn’t pretty smooth, Now, step up, gentlemen, and select ! —William Sanford. For Furious Walking «eT HE CHARGE against you,”’ said the magistrate, “Is that of walking at a furious rate. “Further, it states that, in the law’s de- spite, You walked along the road without a light. “‘We must protect our public, if we can, From perils of the bold pedestrian. “Only last week a motorist was hurt By an unlighted child who did a spurt; “‘And several times my own car has been splashed By nasty wounds of those whom I have mashed.’’ i - able to withstand much pressure, have The sad pedestrian answered, with a sigh, | small waist, firm clutch, partially visible In the Vernacular “rpis true my lamp was out—I know hot ; | mechanism below the body, as in previous Bubbs—Well, how are your New Year’s why— . seasons, and will be absolutely tireless. resolutions wearing? “But this most worthy sergeant knows fi She will be somewhat hard to control and Dubbs—Fine! Had one little puncture, quite well i will require more to run than any previ- but nothing like a regular blowout. I was particular to ring my bell.’’—a. 1. s. E comicbooks.com