Judge, 1913-10-04 · page 7 of 24
Judge — October 4, 1913 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from Judge magazine contains various short humorous pieces typical of early 20th-century American satire: **Main Cartoon:** Shows an old gentleman and small boy—the child dreads being kissed by "this durn woman," while the man suggests the boy shouldn't make faces. It's gentle humor about childhood's reluctant social obligations. **Other Content:** Several brief comedic sketches satirize contemporary society: - A woman misreads baseball terminology, thinking "three men died on bases" reflects actual deaths - A nouveau-riche woman dismisses a "Hamlet" painting because she prefers city scenes to hamlets - A professor mistakes a buried pig for a prehistoric amphibian - Rural characters discuss clothing fashion cycles **Themes:** The humor targets feminine ignorance, class pretension, and rural simplicity—common Judge targets. The "faith curist" joke mocks alternative medicine practitioners. The final poem celebrates women's devotion to cosmetics. The overall tone reflects genteel, era-appropriate satire aimed at educated middle-class readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
‘TWILL NOT BE ALWAYS THUS Old gentleman—1 wouldn't make such faces if I were you, littte man, Smail boy (with difficulty) —You would if you knew this durn woman wuz goin’ t’ kiss you. Baseball Write-ups SHE read the write-up of a game And thought it was a rout, Or else a rough-and-tumble fight, For twenty were thrown out. She thinks the law should take in hand Such terrible disgraces, When papers say, in plain, cold print, That three men died on bases! —George B. Staff. Not to Her Taste Art dealer—This is a beautiful scene from ‘‘Hamlet.’* Mrs. Newrich—I don't care for ham- lets. Show me a good-sized city. Characteristic Mrs, Payton—Have you ever been in- troduced to Mrs. Bloodgood? Mrs. Parvenu—Lots of times, Strictly Modern PROFESSOR BEANBROUGH was ju- bilant. “Ah, ha!"’ he cried, as he rested on his shovel. ‘‘Look what we have unearthed! I believe we have discovered the remains of some herbivorous amphibian of the order plesiosauri!’” Farmer Sodbuster took a good look. “‘Nope, you’re wrong, prof.,’’ he said. “Them bones belonged to a hog I buried here two years ago last fall.’’ Classified Georgie—What's a faith curist, dad? Dad—He’s a fellow who won't take his medicine. Aviators and orators both use the air to rise in life. Sartorial Swiftness ‘ ‘A FELLER has to hustle to keep up with the percession, don’t he?’” mused Ote Wheat. “IT ain’t never tried,’’ responded Erza Slocum. “Last fall, when I went to the city,’”” continued Ote, ‘‘I noticed that my coat was six inches too short. So I took part of my pig money and bought a long one. And, by gum! when I went back this fall, the durn thing was six inches too long.’” Bravery Full credit must sure be allowed her, For fair woman keeps up with the pace; If man boldly faces the powder, No less boldly she powders the face, —Geo. B. Morewood. comicbooks.com