Judge, 1913-05-17 · page 19 of 24
Judge — May 17, 1913 — page 19: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising** with supporting humor content. The main feature is "Passing the Mustard," a humorous poem about a husband reading magazines while his wife dresses—satirizing both marital domestic life and the magazine industry itself by cataloging the random content he consumes (foreign affairs, Wall Street corruption, love stories, muckraking exposés, and product ads). The remaining content consists of **short humorous anecdotes** ("Homespun Homilies," "Why She Guessed So," etc.) typical of Judge's satirical style, poking gentle fun at everyday situations. The page is dominated by **paid advertisements** for travel (Old Dominion Line steamships), jewelry (White Valley Gem Co.), hotel accommodations (Hotel Albert), and drawing schools—standard early 20th-century advertising. One ad promises a "12 Days in the Wonderful North" tour for $60. There is **no obvious political satire** on this particular page; it reflects Judge's role as both humor magazine and advertising vehicle for the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
ally out ina ke te k, if “ent hieal ade! at be ret other ndow Its wher with rant al” nare epi, : > ¢ aol onet}; —m ‘Passing the Mustard When Nellie Dresses When Nellie goes upstairs to dress, I take a magazine And read about the wonders of Some far-off foreign scene; An article on men who graft, The Wall Street system, too; Also the editor's remarks On what next month he'll do. I light my pipe and puff away, The while the page I scan And read a Robert Chambers tale About some love-sick man. A muck-rake expert leads me through A bale of torrid stuff, Explaining how a lot of men Got rich upon a bluff. I read the advertisements next, Of collars, kodaks, cars, And breukfast foods and underwear, Tobacco and cigars. A liberal education I Obtain, I must confess, The evening we are going out And Nellie starts to dress. —Detroit Free Press. Why She Guessed So—Meg (five years old) was overjoyed over the recent addi- tion to the family and rushed out of the house to tell the news to a passing neigh- bor. “Oh, you don’t know what we've got in our house to-day !"’ “What is it?’’ “It’s a new baby brother!"” “You don't say so! Is he going to I guess so,”’ very thoughtfully. ‘‘He’s got his things off.""—Macon (Ga.) Tele- graph. Homespun Homilies—Gabe Toots sez: Noboddy ever heard of anyboddy taking any old medicine, yet there ain’t a home towheres where they ever throw it away. There ain’t nothing prettier and perkier than a little girl just beginning to know the ain’t a little girl no longer. There ain’t no girl what ain’t got mem- crized the specifications of the kind of fellow she means to marry and what misses it farther when the bids is opened. St. Louis Republic. qihe Logical Center—'*So you regard Sloetown as the center of the universe?” isked the visitor. “Yes; we appear to stand still and everything else moves around us,’? ex- Plained the native.—Buffalo Express. Evasion “Let never wineglass touch your lips,’” My pa has made this law. cannot disobey him, so, “Bartender, add a straw.’’ —Columbia Jester. OLD DOMINION LINE SPEND YOUR VACATION IN THE SUNNY SOUTH A Short Sea Trip Over Night to OLD POINT COMFORT, NORFOLK AND RICHMOND, VA. stateroom berth NEW YORK 10 NORFOLK AND OLD POINT | VA. | | anv return | $14.00 | l 2 | Round Trip | tickets, includ. | ing meals and stateroom berth on Steamers NEW YORK | To RICHMOND va | AND RETURN | | $15.00 l The Only Direct Line to OLD POINT COMFORT and NORFOLK Without Change Hot or cold Sea-Water Baths can be procured on Steamer without charge. Steamers are all equipped w the Marconi Wireless Telegraph System. STEAMERS SAIL EVERY WEEK DAY AT 3 P.M. Tickets and Stateroom Reservation, Pier 25, North River, Foot of North Moore Street, New York Phone 3900 Franklin W. L. WOODROW, Trafic Manager Send for Illustrated Pomphlet, Desk J J. J. BROWN, General Passenger Agent mite, GEMS taney goa Pf sclld gold diamond mountings. ring, pio or sted for examiaation—alichargesDrepaid—no money Jn advance. Write today for free IIartrated booklet, special prices ‘ring measure. WHITE VALLEY GEM CO, 72 Saks Bldg ladianapelis. tod Do You Like to Draw? THATS ALL WE WANT TO KNOW oot give you any grand prise 7 ory D amps for pertiolio of rartoeas sod sample yesson plata, aad lot us explain ‘The W. L. Evans School of Cartooning $00 Lester Hide, e. Clevala dO. HOTEL ALBERT 11TH STREET AND UNIVERSITY PLACE ‘One Block West of Broadway NEW YORK CITY Close to Wholesale and Retall Dry Goods Districts, Railroad and St. Lines MODERN ABSOLUTELY FIREPROOF 300 Rooms (200 with Bath) RATES $1.00 PER DAY UP Excellent Restaurant and Cafe le Prices: ‘Send for tree Mlustrated Gulde and Map of New York City Wonderful North Seeinc Foreicn America, including all expenses for travel, berth and board, is offered by the RED CROSS LINE visitiog Mallfax, Nova Scotia and St. John’s, Newfoundland, The most desirable vacation cruise from New York. Excellent Fishing and Shooting New tocrist steamsbips—"'Stephano" and “*Flortzel"*—stted with every device for comfort and safety—wireless, bilge marine bells, etc. 7 days at sea: $ days it No transfers, Splea- did cuisine, Orchestra. be one of the most novel and éelightfal experiences of your life, Redaced rates for superior accommodations daring ‘May, Jane, September and October SEND FOR ILLCETRATED BOOKLET 137 12 DAYS in the $602 UP In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com