Judge, 1913-02-22 · page 18 of 24
Judge — February 22, 1913 — page 18: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a dialectal comic poem using African American Vernacular English (AAVE) of the early 20th century. The narrator, a Black woman, describes how various animals intervene in her romantic choices—a fence-cat, hen, and frog each "reject" suitors (Joe, Harry, Anderson) until the animals point her toward 'Rastus, whom she marries. The humor relies on the conceit that animals possess matchmaking wisdom. The dialect-heavy writing was typical of Judge's era, though by modern standards the heavy phonetic spelling and stereotypical portrayal reflect period prejudices. The page also includes a Monarch typewriter advertisement emphasizing reduced "fatigue" for typists, and a brief note about Harvard banning street signs from student rooms—practical administrative concerns of the time.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
tremely light action of the Mon- arch Typewriter endears it to all op- erators who use it. The typist who takes pride in her position finds great satisfaction in being able to turn out as much work, and as good work, per hour, toward the end of the working day as during the morning. Other conditions being the same, she can always do this on a Monarch. There is “No Three O’Clock Fatigue” for users of this ma- chine. The mechanical rea- son for the Monarch light touch is found in the action of the Monarch type bar, an exclusive and pat- ented feature which gives this remarkably light touch. We would remind the busi- ness man that Monarch light touch means more work and better work, because less physical strength is expend- ed by the operator. There- fore, cost per folio is re- duced, making the Monarch a business economy. SEND FOR MONARCH LITERATURE ‘Then try the Monarch, and be con- vinced that Monarch merit rests in the machine itself, not merely in what we tell you about it. Monarch Department Remington Typewriter Company (ncorporated) New York and Everywhere The Matchmakers, By SARA LYNCH. Yo BES’ be kin’ ter animels— Dey cain do a heap at spells Fo’ deh frien’s. Say, is yo’ heared dat me an’ 'Rastus gwine marry? Moughty queer how frogs an’ t’ings Has a say ‘bout weddin’ rings; But, sho’s yo’ bohn, dey picks mah hus- ban’ out f’om ’Rastus, Joe an’ Harry! I falls turribly in love—jes’ de way gals does— But I couldn’ nohow tell what man hit wuz. Wal, Joe he fotch me home one night F'om de ball. He ‘pear jes’ right When he say, ‘‘I loves yo’, honey! Oh, yo’s sot mah heart on fire!’’ Den, ez sho’s I’s in dis place, A fence-cat look him in de face An’ say, ‘‘Whar’s Mariar? Yo’ orter be a-ch-amed o’ yo’se’f! Whar's Mariar?"’ An’ I takes dat little hint an’ I says per- lite, “Please escuse me, Mr. Washington. Good-night!’" On Sunday mawnin’ Harry come. We wuz walkin’ roun’ mah home— Him a-talkin’ sweet—when somepin’ lak a hen come rushin’ past us. Wid face a-blazin’ lak she seem Ter hate to do it, dat hen scream, “*Yo’ better t’ take—yo'’better t’ take —yo’ better t’ take ’Rastus!’’ An'I takes dat little hint an’ perlite I say, “Please escuse me, Mr. Anderson. Good- day!" Now, ’Rastus he were at de creek; I gits down dar putty quick. But 'Rastus nebber talk no love, an’ all Ido I couldn’ make him. He jes’ tell erbout his dog— When, 'clar’ ter goodness! a ol’ frog Staht a-callin’ lak a solemn pahson, “Take—'im! Take—'im! Take —im!" Den I cries out, ‘*Mistah Frog, I's no leaper, I isn’; But ef 'Rastus do de astin’, J is hisn!"’ My! ’Rastus quick jump f’om dat log. “Hi! what dat yo’ tell dat frog?”’ An’ his arms dey keep a-reachin’ lak fo’ sho’ he gwine ter grab me. I says cool, ‘‘Yo" ast me right!” An’ soon I adds, But is yo’ astii Den I soft answers, ‘Yo’ cain hab me."” Den come de sho’est sign dat he love me bes’— He gin me all his money fo’ mah weddin dress. Fooled Again. Penfield—The great American novel has never been written. Crabshaw—Still, I see it’s constantly being advertised. The less certain some men are as to the soundness of their arguments, the louder they talk. ’ —+——_——_ HARVARD BARS SIGNS itudents Can't Use Them in Future for Room Decorations, TBy Telegraph to The Tribune.) Boston, Jan. %—The faculty of Harvard University has decided that hereafter sign posts, street signs and similar un- Mghtly objects shall not be used by atu. dents as room decorations. In barring aigns the faculty breaks up a custom of long standing. Hereafter the decorations of students’ rooms must be confined to the use of con- ventional pictures, photographs, banners, etc. It has been the delight of students in the past to collect street signs during thelr evening outings, and post them con- spicuously around the walle in their rooms. The practice caused much annoy- ance, especially when street signs were taken, and merchants were frequently re- quired to replace their business signs sev- eral times during the yhoo! year. Cheer Up! 'HE Judge Art Prints make attractive room decorations. Signs aren't needed. You'll find the niftiest picture girls going in the Judge Art Print Series. It would be a good idea to make your selection of Easter presents from the Art Print Catalog. Send ten cents for it. It contains reproductions in miniature of the entire Judge Art Print Series. Leslie- Judge Co. 225 5th Ave., New York In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE, It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com