Judge, 1913-01-18 · page 21 of 24
Judge — January 18, 1913 — page 21: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains several short humorous pieces typical of early 20th-century American humor: **"Passing the Mustard"** consists of literary parodies mocking overwrought Victorian prose—authors using impossible metaphors like "dropped her eyes" (implying physical eyeballs falling) or "her voice then broke" (suggesting literal breakage). The remaining jokes are brief social satires: husbands complaining about wives' chattiness, a millionaire boasting about earning money, a Greek immigrant quickly adopting American attitudes about ethnic conflict, and complaints about women's fashion accessories (earrings) causing workplace tardiness. **The Prince Albert tobacco advertisement** dominates the right side, promoting cigarette tobacco in a weather-proof bag—typical of period advertising claims about convenience and quality. The humor relies on puns, literal interpretations of figurative language, and gentle mockery of contemporary social behaviors and gender dynamics—reflecting attitudes and comedic sensibilities now largely dated.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Passing the Mustard. Book Notes. “Her eyes flashed fire.’ This from a book, And next: ‘‘She froze Him with a look.” —Detroit Free Press. “She dropped her eyes,” The author wrote; Yet they were not Of glass, we note. —Denver Republican. “*Her countenance fe Though she was tall, It was not dam- Aged by the fall. — Boston Transcript. Her voice then broke. He had a guess, And as he spoke, She murmured, ‘‘Yes."" An Entertainer.—Diggs—'‘My wife is a wonderful vocalist. Why, I have known her to hold her audience for bours"’—— Biggs—'*Get out!” Diggs—"*After which she would lay it in the cradle and rock it to sleep."”— Tennesseean. You sure can buy RINGE ALBERT the national joy smoke in the toppy 5c weather-proof bag P. A. not only hits jimmy pipe smokers from A to Z, but even the packages are made to suit every taste and desire. Prince Albert is sold in the toppy sc cloth bag that’s protected inside and outside with weather-proof paper. Fits into any corner of any pocket. Or you can buy it —just like most folks al- ways have—in the famous tidy roc red tin that lays, easy-like, on your hip or in Simplicity. —‘“ Yes, we had a big home a coat pocket. wedding.”” “You say it passed off smoothly? we hired a Broadway director, o i ad ct jet jimmy pipe joyous via P. A.! Know that here's the one and he staged it just as if it had been a Ri smoke that can’t bite your tongue, because the bite’s cut out musical comedy.”’—Louisville Courier | : yy @ patented process. Journal. Catch this hunch—you buy P. A. anywhere, everywhere—only goto it, either in a jimmy on Quite a Lot.—‘‘I tell you, Binks,”’ said the millionaire, with great gusto, ‘‘talk about your fun! There's none to equal 3 that of earning a million, dollar by er aimee dollar! a . ting away from you! “By ginger!" said little Binks. ane a lot of fun there is ahead of Tovey Se bags; tidy 10¢ ei” ins; handsome pound ai '—Harper’s Weekly. half-pound humidors. R. J. Reynolds Tobacco Co. Winston-Salem, N. C. Sensible. —‘‘Our new citizens quickly pick up American ideas.”’ “How now?’ “T asked the Greek bootblack on our block if he wasn’t going home to fight, and he tells me that he is paired with the Turk who runs the fruit stand." Washington Herald. With Many Items.—‘‘Did you hire : 2 that plumber I recommended to you?"" ‘Says “Hunch:” “Yes."" . s7Te.ata’e the package that tlehles your “How did he turn out?"" alate 80-i1'* god ot 1, A. right sot. the ast. grains “Oh, he filled the bill, all right.""— Tooke ube bed feane fimmy pipe Jo Boston Transcript. Fortunate.—Kitty—‘‘Isn’t_ it a most fortunate thing?’ Ethel—‘*What?"” Good Thing. — Bloobs—‘*Good thing Methuselah was a man and not a woman!’? ing a great fuss about you! Doesn't it make you proud?”? Hen—‘‘Of course it doean’t! They Kitty—"That people can't read the kisses that have been printed upon a girl's lips.""—St. Louis Post-Dispatch. One at a Time.—She—‘*When we are married, dear, I must have three serv- ants."” He—“‘Certainly, darling. Bat keep each as long as possible Louis Post-Dispatch. In the Barnyard.—Goose—‘‘My dear Mrs. Hen, the papers are certainly mak- only do it to egg me on,’’—Baltimore American. One Reason Salaries Aren't Raised.— Overheard in the washroom: ‘*Why don't you wear your other earrings, dearie? They're swell!” “Oh, I can’t make ’em stick in my ears! Why, I had such trouble getting these to stick that it made me half an hour late to work this morning !’’"—De- troit News. Slobbs—‘* Why 2" Blobbs —‘*Well, if he had been a woman we would never have known how old she really was.’’—Philadelphia Record. A Wedding Gift.—He—'' What are you going to give Kitty and Jack for a wed- ding present?” She—Oh, I guess I'll send Kitty the bunch of letters Jack wrote me when we were engaged.’’—Boston Transcript. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com