Judge — January 11, 1913 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Passing the Mustard. Of Course.—‘ What did your lawyer say when you stated your purpose to him? “‘He said it was fees-ible.""—Bos- ton Transcript. Classifying Him.—‘‘Brother Hard- e esty, can’t you make your contribu- tion for the education of the heathen a little larger than usual this year?”’ “Dr. Goodman, I'm more than doubling it; Ihave just started that youngest boy of mine to college.”"— Chicago Tribune. Not To Be Caught.—Teacher —‘‘What is the stuff heroes are made of, Tommy?" Tommy—‘You'll have to excuse me, teacher, but I’m not booming any particular breakfast food!’?— Yon- kers Statesman, The Lost Word. — Caller —‘*You rH know, there was something I wanted to say to you, but it has quite gone out of my mind. I can’t remember what it was.’’ Maiden (hopefully)—‘It wasn’t good-night, was it?”’—Woman’s Home Companion. To arrive at the top in any department or commercial effort one must produce, offerand do bet- ter than has been produced, offered or done before. Fifty years ago we determined that Sunny B must be the finest whiskey distilled and aged in Old Kentucky and we have never deviated from this Increasing the Time.—Mrs. Towne policy. Today we are known as the largest distillers —‘‘Have you had this set of china Of fine old whiskies in the world, long?”” i lo gh Suilaiba:-Aitaecma ee Sunny Brook reached the top because it re. § I" surpassed all others in mellow flavor, exquisite bou- had it just four girls and a half.’’— quet and tonic properties. The friends Sunny ‘Brook made fitty years ago because Philadelphia Record. of its high quality and purity are still its friends. and all over this broad landa majority i publi der ay Brook and absolutely refuses jubst ray o . is a real honest, straight Kentucky an What a debt bottled i Ty bottle is filled and then sealed with the “Green Stat the direct supervision of U.S. Inspectors. "If you want to best always ask for Sunny Brook—The Pure Food A Debt to Science. we owe to medical science !"’ he said, as he put down the paper. 4 heavens!’’ she exclaimed. u paid that doctor's bill —Chicago Post. Uninterested.—‘*‘Who was it that said, ‘After me the deluge’?”” “Oh, I ¢ t know,’ replied Mrs. Cumrox. ‘I never pay any attention to these ther prophets.'’—Wash- ington Star. The Short Cut.—‘‘What do you think is the best way to abate the smoke nuisance?” “There is only one way to do that.’’ What is it?’’ ‘Buy good cigars.’ — Baltimore American. The Solution.- servant-girl problem. “That so? How?’" “She's decided to do the work her- self.’'—Detroit Free Press. It's Class.—‘‘ After all, restraint of one’s anger is something of a gastro- nomic dilemma.”” “I don’t understand exactly what you mean."”” “That you must either swallow your wrath or afterward eat your words.''—Baltimore American, How It Struck Her.—Hub (with newspaper)—“‘ Listen to this, wifey. ‘For every missionary sent abroad last year, Christian America sent 1,495 gallons of liquor.’ ’’ Wifey —‘‘Merciful goodness! Who'd ever think missionaries were such drinkers?’’—Boston Transcript. Be An Artist Make Money Drawing Comic Pictures, Let the world’s fam- ous cartoonist, Eugene Zimmer- man, spill a few ideas into your head. Get the Zim Book—its chuck full of vatuable sugg Price, $1.00, postpaid. + Morocco. anteed. Money back urned within 10 ¢ Address: Zim Book, Room 1149, Brunswick Bldg., New York. UNIVERSITY PLACE One Block West of Broadway’ NEW YORK CITY MODERN ABSOLUTELY FIREPROOF, 300 Rooms (200 with Bath) RATES $1.00 PER DAY UP ‘Keections, octaurass and Cafe. Bend for free illustrated Culdeand Map of New York City. There’s just the difference be- tween a raw, poorly made Cock- tail and a Club Cocktail that there is between a raw, new: Whiskey and a soft old one. The best of ingredients—the most accurate blending cannot give the softness and mel- lowness that age imparts. Club Cocktails are aged in wood before bottling—and no freshly made Cocktail can be as good. Me ittam, Martini and ether lard blends, bottled, ready serve through crached ice. Refuse Substitutes AT ALL DEALERS G.F. HEUBLEIN & BRO., Sole Props. Hartford New York ” London In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com