Judge — December 14, 1912 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HE STUDIED UNDER THE OLD MASTERS. Early Christmas Suggestions. PUNCTURED automobile tire, painted green and embellished with holly berries, done in water colors, will make a very acceptable and fireproof substitute for a Christ- mas wreath to hang in the front window of your house or over the fireplace. The puncture should, of course, be repaired and the tire in- flated before using. A very chaste design for an em- broidered motto to be sent to a very rich uncle as a Yuletide remembrance can be made of the words, ‘It Is More Blessed To Give Than To Re- ceive,’’ done in long green letters on a background of silver floss, the whole mounted on a gold passe-par- tout and framed in a papier-mach frame made of the giver’s promissory notes reduced toa pulp. With this should go a card marked, R. S. V. P.D.Q. A pleasant little Christmas re- membrance for a suffragette friend spending the holidays in an English jail is a Pompeiian brick, attached to a good, strong, elastic band, about six feet long, having a stretching power of eighteen feet, so arranged that the brick immediately snaps back into the hand of the thrower after it has penetrated the crystal- line depths of a plate- glass window, acting on the principle of the old game of cup- and-ball, so popular in days of yore. A welcome present for a maiden lady, whose estimated worth is one million dollars, to give to a favorite niece, who has just married a handsome young ath- lete with a taste for first editions and no income, would be a blank check on her bank, signed, and for protective purposes marked with a per- forated stamp, ‘‘Not More Than $20,000."" An attractive re- membrance for an impecunious but appreciative customer to give to a courteous tailor, who has been more than lenient in the matter of his overdue account, would be a check for twenty-five dollars on account, wrapped around a ten-cent cigar, and handed to him casually on Christmas morning. The price of the cigar may be deducted from the amount of the bill later on, In view of certain conditions in the coal market, a scuttleful of an- thracite neatly done up in a decor- ated hod, marked ‘‘Love the Giver,"’ will be a popular and in many cases warmly welcomed novelty for the coming Ch son. A neat card to go with this would be your own visiting card, with the words, “‘Do not spurn me, But take and burn me,"" engrossed in red, white and blue letters and framed in splinters of kindling wood. mas sea- CHILDISH WISDOM. Uncle Cholly—* Now, Elsie, there is a monkey. The animal that looks the most like a man."" Elsie—"' Oh, pshaw! Not much. Why, it doesn’t look any more like a man than you, uncle."” Innocent. It was shortly after Adam and Eve had, by request, left the Garden of Eden. One morning Adam labored in the field. As he went about, he noted that the cave-bear skin which he wore insisted in shifting on him, much to his displeasure. A thought came to him. Peeling two narrow strips of green bark from a neighboring sapling, he carried out a plan which had followed the thought, and realized that he had met with success, Had he not done so, it is possible that eleven million of the fancy Christmas boxes of to-day would not contain suspenders. Adam meant all right and knew naught of what was to come. Our hard feelings do not extend in his direction, Lelie Van Every. “Always look ahead’’ is a good pre- scription, but it also pays to look behind. Pounder—'' I have heard that Rounder was not regarded as a Square man.’ Bounder—' So have 1; but I don't believe that he is as black as he is painted."’ comicbooks.com