Judge — October 5, 1912 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ters abloid d, of alone, » Lose titude yland. me, is perpe- ‘There 1 best y prose geling morons of Em- checked ny try: Smporia ary sub- rst into ve-rack- Prow- od, offer ie mor- inortem painless 1" to ap i) I be- y sleep. » Tre antido Three y jokes on. re lying Amusing Stories About Well-known Persons Saving Time. Seaator Swanson was stopping at a botd ina small town in Virginia some time ago, and the clerk allowed him to qrersleep himself and he missed the "pus to the depot. Hastily dressing himself, as he only bad a few minutes to catch his train, he ran out of the hotel and boarded a horse aarwhich happened to be passing at the time. The car jogged along slowly, and the senator, keeping track of the time, was getting uneasy. Finally, losing his pa- tience, he spoke to the driver sharply, “Can't you whip up a little? I'll niss my train if I don’t go faster than “This is fast as I can go,’’ said the driver calmly; then suddenly, bright thought came to him, ‘you can get of and catch the car behind me. That fellow’s mules is faster than nine.” as a A Kentucky Suspicion. When Champ Clark, of Missouri, was prosecuting attorney of Pike County, an old darky came into his office at Louisi- tra one morning, and, after beating srand the bush for a few minutes, brooght forth the object of his visit. “Wuzn’ you bawn in Kaintucky, Mars Champ?” he inquired. “Sare, Uncle Henry!" “T'se had spishuns you wuz, suh, mo'n (eee; but the other mawnin’, when you made dat speech agin Sam Logan an’ Yeu said dat whiskey wuz de greatest eil in de wor’, I begins to hab mis- écabtments, suh.’” “What's where I was born got to do : it, Uncle Henry? It’s a fact, isn’t itr” “V'se bawn in Kaintucky myse’f, ae id Uncle Henry, with pride, &' Thain’ givin’ off no 'pinions on &t print; but you'd please me clean Pykee Groun’, suh, ef you'd tell me “* Prosecutin’ ’torney has to swear Dhis speech, er does he jis’ talk to be talkin’ to de jury?" ! In answering Your Telephone Horizon The horizon of vision, the circle which bounds our sight, has not changed. It is best observed at sea. Though | the ships of today are larger than the | ships of fifty years ago, you cannot see them until they come up over the edge of the world, fifteen or twenty miles away. A generation ago the horizon of speech was very limited. When your grandfather was a young man, his voice could be heard on a still day for perhaps a mile. Even though he used a speaking trumpet, he could not be heard nearly so far as he could be seen. Today all this has been changed. The telephone has vastly extended the horizon of speech. Talking two thousand miles is an everyday occurrence, while in order to see this distance, you would need to mount your telescope on a platform approximately 560° miles high. As amanis followed by hisshadow, so is he followed by the horizon of telephone communication. When he travels across the continent his tele- phone horizon travels with him, and wherever he may be he is always at the center of a great circle of telephone neighbors. What is true of one man is true of the whole public. In order to provide a telephone horizon for each member of the nation, the Bell System has been established. AMERICAN TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH. COMPANY AND ASSOCIATED COMPANIES Every Bell Telephone is the Center of the System. For Liquor and Drug Users A scientific remedy that has cured nearly half a million in the past thirty-two years, Administered by medical specialists at Keeley Institutes only. fy Write To advertisements please mention JUDGE. the for particulars Following Keeley Institutes: St Loole, Mo. 2801 Locus Pittabare, Pa, 246 FUND A yi cunt Rroeidences RCE a) Columbia. SG. ite Plaing. N.Y, Salt Lake City, Utah, Columbus. Ohio, Toronto, Ontaria, Port Winntpeg. Manitoba. Philadelphia, Pa, S18. Broad St London. England It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com