Judge, 1912-09-21 · page 3 of 24
Judge — September 21, 1912 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several distinct satirical pieces: **"Back to the Land"** is a poem mocking the "back-to-the-land" movement—a early-20th-century trend where urbanites romanticized farming. The satire undercuts this idealism by listing unglamorous farm realities: alfalfa, pumpkins, onions, and the hard work of selling produce. **"Lots of People"** briefly notes that people spend more time making excuses than improving themselves—social commentary on human nature rather than specific politics. **"Not as Fresh as the Clerk"** is a simple joke about a new store clerk unfamiliar with inventory. **The large illustration**, "The Land of the Heart's Desire," depicts an airship approaching a fantastical castle—likely satirizing escapist fantasies and the allure of unrealistic dreams, reinforcing the "back to the land" theme's disconnect from reality.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“Back to the Land.” *M BOUND to be a farmer And with the farmers stand, Alfalfa on my forehead, A pitchfork in my hand. I'm bound to husk the pumpkin, The tearful onion hoe; Prize potatoes, sugar beets And parsnips I will grow. When autumn is upon us, I'll go to town afar And sell a load of turkeys, To buy a motor car, Helen Faten Lots of People. Lots of people spend more time trying to make their neighbors good than in making good them- selves. Considering Gladys Brown's love of hair, how strangely she chose in the matrimonial market. Not as Fresh as the Clerk. A stern old lady stepped into a store one morn- ing and asked of the new clerk, ‘Have you any fresh vegetables this morning?"’ “I do not know,’ answered the clerk. only been here two weeks.”’ “Tve THE LAND OF THE HEART'S DESIRE. Unprofessional. Bings—‘‘What do you think of the young woman out West who wrote a novel with her toes?” Jings—‘ Her confession of meth- od was quite unprofessional.’’ Bings—‘ Why?” Jings—""Well, it was a trade secret, The result will be that the country will be literally flooded with ‘best sellers.’ ’* Grammatical Points. “Yes, ‘kiss’ is a noun,”’ explained Jack, ‘1 allow; But common or proper? answer me now."" Too easy the question a second to stop her, “Why, a kiss,’’ replied Madge,‘‘is both common and proper." Come, comicbooks.com