Judge, 1912-06-29 · page 9 of 25
Judge — June 29, 1912 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This satirical story mocks the romantic urban fantasy of "rustic simplicity." A city dweller seeking a peaceful farm retreat encounters a shrewd farmer advertising an "outdoor" boarding house. Through a negotiation scene, the farmer systematically reveals that his supposedly simple, affordable country retreat comes with hidden costs and labor expectations. The joke: the farmer extracts payment through inflated food prices (milk and eggs are "way up"), charges extra for basic amenities (carpet, meat), and demands free labor (garden work, hay-stacking, entertainment). The "bluff and wholehearted" rustic proves to be a cunning businessman exploiting the city visitor's romanticized expectations. The satire targets both the naïve urban fantasy of country life and the actual exploitation of summer boarders by rural entrepreneurs. The accompanying fishing cartoon ("At the Turn of the Tide") offers a simpler joke about an impatient fisherman.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Absent-minded fisherman—" It's queer ! AT THE TURN OF THE TIDE. T haven't had a bite for the last two hours."’ Rustic Simplicity. I WAS seeking a farm retreat, a quiet and soothing spot, away from the wearying surroundings of the sordid town; a restful place, among rustic simplicity and innocence; unsophisti- cated folk, though bluff and whole- hearted—a typical home of the soil, such as the summer-boarder books tell about. The environment of the little wayside station where I alighted from the train seemed to give promise of the very thing I was looking about me when a_ stoop-shouldered man, with long, yellow whiskers, drove up with a load of milk cans. As I was watching him unload his milk, he said to me, “Thinkin’ o’ buyin’ a farm?"’ “‘No,"’ I replied. ‘‘I’m seeking a summer boarding place, on a farm.”’ “Land o’ Goshen!’’ exclaimed the man, with agrin. ‘You've struck the right feller! I’ve got one o’ the farm- in’est farm boardin’ places that lays out 0’ doors!"’ That was pleasant to hear, and I was almost ashamed to intrude business on rural simplicity; but I thought I might as well, so I said, “Ah! What do you charge a week for board?” **Well,’’ was the answer, ‘‘that’s ac- cordin’ to the situation, Want a hull lot o’ p’serves an’ setch, I s’pose?”” By ED MOTT. “Oh, no!"’ I replied. awful lot.’ “Willin’ to eat with the family?"" “I wouldn’t object to that at-all,’’ I said. “‘Carpet on your room?”’ “TI think I would prefer a carpet— yes,’ I said. “You'd ’spect meat an’ ’taters, I s’pose?’’ “Not such an ““1'VE GOT ONE 0" THE PARMIN'IST PARM BOARD- IN’ PLACES THAT LAYS OUT 0° DooRS.’” “Certainly. And eggs and milk, of course.’” “Um-m-m! Milk is 'way up, I s’pose you know, now; and as fer eggs—well, eggs is eggs more’n I ever knowed ‘em. Was you thinkin’ some o’ havin’ chick- ens, too?’" I replied that I had been turning chick- ens over in my mind some—yes; and I began to think that here was, indeed, a bluff and hearty example of rustic sim- plicity. “*Well, chickens,"’ said he, ‘tis goin’ to be nigh as valuable this summer as the goose that laid the golden eggs, an’ if we kill ’em they'll have tocome high. Any objection to workin’ in the garden an hour or so before breakfast, to sort o’ skeer up an appetite?’’ I smiled and said that the exercise would, no doubt, be just what I wanted. “Kin you milk?” “No.” “That's a little sort of a drawback to gittin’ bottom figgers, but mebbe you won't mind helpin’ load hay or stack wheat on a pinch?”’ “I would rather enjoy that,’’ I said. “‘When night comes, I s’pose you'll play the banjo and sing them coon songs fer the folks?’’ “I can’t do either,” I replied. (Continued in advertising section.) comicbooks.com