Judge, 1912-06-15 · page 24 of 28
Judge — June 15, 1912 — page 24: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising with satirical poetry**. The main content is a mock-heroic poem titled "When the Last Plate Glass Has Been Broken," a parody of Rudyard Kipling that imagines the aftermath of **women's suffrage activism**. The satire targets **suffragettes** (women fighting for voting rights), portraying their victory as destructive chaos. The poem mockingly predicts that once women gain power, they will: - Replace male leaders entirely - Force men to learn cooking - Control politics and business - Claim moral superiority while men become irrelevant The tone is dismissive—depicting suffragettes as vengeful and hypocritical, while suggesting their triumph would be civilization's collapse. This reflects **anti-suffrage sentiment common in 1910s America**, when Judge magazine frequently mocked women's rights activism. The surrounding content—cocktail and beer advertisements—is standard commercial filler typical of period magazines.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
AU rights secured. There’s just the difference be- tween a raw, poorly made Cock- tail anda Club Cocktail that there is between a raw, new Whiskey and a soft old one. The best of ingredients—the most accurate blending cannot give the softness and mel- lowness that age imparts. Club Cocktails are aged in wood before bottling—and no freshly made Cocktail can be as good. M 1, Martin and other ate id blends, bottled, ready to serve through cracked ice, Refuse Substitutes AT ALL DEALERS G.F. HEUBLEIN & BRO., Sele Hartiord New York.” London” [iad HIGH LIFE BEER Breweo By Mitcer « Mitwaukee ! THe CHAMPAGNE Or BottLeo When the Last Plate Glass Has Been Broken. (With Apolocics t0 Rudyard Kipling.) WHEN THE last plate glass has been broken and the last loose stone has been shied, And our staunchest antagonist van- quished, and all votes to an apron- string tied, We shall rest, and, faith, we shall need it—sit down for a minute or two, Until we can gather our senses and find something startling to do. And those who were clubbed shall be happy; they shall sit in a golden chair, And tell to their less favored sisters how they fought the policemen for fair. They shall talk of their deeds of valor and record them in history’s book, While the dethroned lords of creation are trying to learn how to cook. And these suffragettes, sure, shall tell us just what they think of Saint Paul, Who said that the women must keep on their hats and sit down and say ncth- ing at all. They shall wipe from the pathway be- fore them the slimy trail left by their foes, And whether they'll wipe us men clean off the map is worrying us, goodness knows. And none but the women shall praise us, and none but the women shall blame. And none but the women shall prose- cute trusts or play the political game. And each for the joy of the showing, with face calm and sweet as a saint, Shall teach us that when we think wom- en are squelched, to make up our minds that they ain’t.— ater L. Dann. A Wreck of Diplomacy. Candidate for mayor (to his private secretary)—‘*You tell me that he said my remarks were spasmodic and above the people’s heads, do you? Now, what did he really say, anyway?” Secretary—‘Well, if you must have it, he said that you reminded him of a dog barking at the moon!” (Subject dropped.) His Favorite Spot. Jones—"“At the seashore one evening last week Von Boggins, the matinee idol, came near drowning.” Brown—‘‘He can’t swim. . How did he happen to go beyond his depth?” Jones—'Trying to keep in the glare of the searchlight of a passing steamer."” Every lover of good cocktail should call for Abbott's Bitters, Makes the beat. C. W. Abtott & Co., Baltimore, Md. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGF. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com