Judge, 1912-05-04 · page 21 of 23
Judge — May 4, 1912 — page 21: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains primarily **advertising** rather than political satire. The dominant content is a large **Schlitz beer advertisement** featuring two men in a tasting comparison. The ad's central claim—that brown bottles preserve beer quality better than light bottles, which develop an off-taste—was a genuine commercial argument of the era. The smaller humorous pieces are light domestic humor: - **"Bridget's Pie Dough"** is a comic poem mocking Irish immigrant speech patterns through deliberate misspellings ("snough" for "snow," "gough" for "go"), reflecting period ethnic stereotyping. - **"Deuteronomy"** is a brief joke about baldness and hair loss. - Other small ads include patent medicine endorsements and business opportunity pitches typical of early 20th-century magazines. The page reflects Judge's mix of satirical commentary with commercial advertising and gentle domestic humor, without significant political content visible here.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
his unearned increment for lemon-stick treatments. | e The hand-maiden noted his imperfect Cc th +: t f foot-work, and with the modesty of her ompare e as ae © { kind she commented on it and learned : | EUS2S.S72 im BROWN BOTTLES ie life. With visions of a rake-off, she Wa ss fecommenves 22 = . teay felene ve i a e e was a professional pedigougist, and the | || eee with beer in light bottles ‘. went, he sat, and was corn-cured. oo . . A That is where he made a mighty mis- Schlitz is as pure when poured into your glass as when at 7 take. The man of one talent should left the brewery. It's the Brown Bottle. It keeps out the light. :- nurse his talent until it is paying big Light develops in beer a peculiar taste and a disagreeable odor. dividends, and then he should capitalize it to enhance its earning capacity. If one has nothing in the world but an Schlitz is properly aged before leaving the brewery habitually beautiful grouch, he should not join a sunshine social and sacrifice his only asset on the altar of cheerful- Schlitz in Brown Bottles costs you no more than common ness. He should cultivate that grouch | keer in light bottles. to the nth power, and some day a svul- less but not graspless corporation may make him its purchasing agent, and | success is his. After the man of one talent had his corn crop harvested, he lost his strangle hold on prognosis, and criticisms on his bum work as forecaster of fair and foul This is not a theory. Tt is a fact proven by scientists. Tt will not cause biliousness, nor ferment in your stomach, Order a case from your cealer today. See that crown or cork is branded “Schlitz”. weather poured in on him from many sources. Eventually he was jacked up by his superior, and finally was fired bodily for predicting fair weather for election day when he should have fore- told frosts and a landslide. Thus was success turned to failure by a reckless sacrifice on the altar of van- | ity, and the man of one talent joined the ne’er-come-backs and boasted that he had lost on a fluke. Bridget’s Pie Dough. (Being also a lesson in deformed spelling.) When Bridget makes for pie the dough, She sifts the flour as white as snough, And into this, with motions slough, Lets salt and baking powder gough; Then butter and a scanty flough Of water (temperature quite lough); And next, with gentle pat and blough, She shapes it, rolls it, and, heigh-hough! There are two crusts quite aprough-pough _——————————— For any pie on earth to shough! AGENTS ' DROE DEAD ONES. AWAKE AGENTS! LEARN th 7 IeW WAY —hida Keck Wiggins, © THE 20th CENTURY WONDER s \ i |Get started in an honest, clean, reliable, money-making D Wyaria’e, magtoat eitt reall Paige inveetion. leuteronomy. > | WATER POWER Vai SAGE MA lites Pastor—‘‘Is it not a wonderful o thought, my dear Mr. Jones, that even the hairs of your head are numbered?”’ Cynical old bachelor (with a rueful glance in the mirror)—‘‘Oh, I don’t know! I could count ’em myself.’’ Every lover of @ good cocktail should insist that Aboott’s Bitters be used in making it; insures your getting the very best. C. W. Abbott & Co., Baltimore, Md. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com