Judge — April 27, 1912 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

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It is, in | itself, a prize for the | complexion. | 20 In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. The Hillburys Try Touring. (Concluded from 4 preceding pote) tourists who were passing on both sides of him, some in one direction and some in another, and all too closely enveloped in dust to appreciate his perilous posi. tion. Meantime the taximeter had reached $22.40 and the car had encoun- tered an upgrade. There was a sudden decrease in speed, followed by a halt and a retreat. The car was soon backing down the hill faster than it had moved at any time during the initial leg of the New England tour. The problem of steering a rapidly receding taxicab was too complex a one for Mrs. Hilibury. It was her cue to faint. This she didas gracefully as she could, considering that she was supported in the center only by the sill of the window out of which she was leaning. By this time her husband had got back a portion of his breath, and managed to turn about on the hood and grab the wheel that she had deserted. He gave it an enthusiastic turn. The car swerved and made for an ex- cavation at the side of the road, into which it backed gracefully and stopped Mr. Hillbury climbed off the hood ard y his wife to a more lady- like position the tonneau. While she was engaged in coming to, he be came submerged in thought. At last 3, and he remarked, carefully dre nside she opened her ey “Say, dear, did it ever occur to you that if you engaged a taxicab to transport you toa given point and then insisted that the chauffeur back you all the way hore, the taximeter wouldn't register anything and therefore you'd have po bill to pay?” Mrs. Hillbury sighed and remarked sadly that as far as she could remember this had never occurred to her. An Old Joke in New Clothes. A chick one day was quite distrest To find an orange in her nest. “Oh, dear!"? she cried. ‘*What can it mean? So strange a sight I've never seen For fear her had played her tricks, She summoned all the other chicks; And then this inquiry she made, “*D’you see the orange marmalade?” A Definition. “A philanthropist, pa’’—— “The average philanthropist, my £09, is a miser whose vanity has temporarily got the better of his greed."’ A summer shower, now and then, § relished by the farmer men. Every lover of a good cocktail should inst that Abbott's Bitters be used in making it; inne? your getting the very best. C, W. Abbott & Baltimore, Md. comicbooks.com finan’ ing. opinio: pat th advice that Bota tobe s When Ma sai Be Th Come Man; creased Ther thatan