Judge, 1912-04-06 · page 10 of 28
Judge — April 6, 1912 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two unrelated humor pieces from Judge magazine: **"Jimpsy Boy"** (top): A lighthearted children's poem about a drowsy baby, celebrating how sleep transforms a fussy, demanding infant into a peaceful, well-behaved child. The humor appeals to parents exhausted by babies' constant demands. **"A Sort o' Biography of Noah"** (bottom): A satirical retelling of the Biblical flood narrative that applies modern bureaucratic/commercial absurdity to ancient times. The joke mocks Noah's impractical solution—building a massive ship near a brook hoping for spring flooding—and treats the ark like a modern passenger vessel with steerage, docking fees, and "schedule times." The text's deadpan tone and anachronistic details (calling it a "maiden trip," mentioning "leap year," Noah's 950-year lifespan) create humor through the incongruity of treating mythology with contemporary practicality. The final note suggests selling toy ark replicas to children as Christmas gifts. Both pieces use gentle, family-friendly humor typical of Judge magazine's content.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
we HEN Jimpsy Boy is sleepy, Then his head begins to Nod! His eyes go blinky-winky, In a way that’s really Odd! He tries to shout and chatter, But he simply yawns ‘in- Stead; Then mamma knows the place for him Is in his comfy Bed. A Sort OAH, a celebrated nav- igator of the old school, was born on or about 2448 B. C., ina small hamlet about two inches north of the equator. (See any good map.) He took a manual training course, specializing in carpenter- ing, and, when a youth of 250 summers, conceived the idea of building a mam- moth liner. There being no ocean near his house he erected his leviathan (see any good dictionary) near a brook, hoping that there would be a freshet in the spring. Such was the case. When the boat was done a Night-time. He doesn’t want his daddy, And he doesn’t like his Toys! He wants to whack his mother, And he makes a funny Noise! But when he's in his cradle, His mouth just opens So-o-o! And you need not blow the whistle, For it’s going, going, Go! When Jimpsy Boy is sleeping, He's good as good can Be. fe. Oh, this would be a gloomy world Without such mites as He! Biography of Noah. chickens in the hatchway, his wife in the companion- way, the fish in the salon, the elephants in the trunk room, and al] others in the hold. The ship made her maiden trip in 150 days, arriving at Ararat on schedule time. Here it was found that docking privileges were very high, but Noah, being philosophi- cal, disembarked quietly, and commenced at once to raise garden truck. He was very successful, and was building up an excel- lent practice when he sud- denly died at the tender age of 950. Noah’s chief gift to the world was the heavy rain fell, and it of February and eleven days in March, this being leap year. Just suggestion for the present- rained without check before the deck hands shouted, ‘‘all ashore that’s going ashore,"’ ing of diminutive replicas (there being norain checks Noah drove all his household pets, including the family, on board, of his historic craft to in those early days) for all _ placing his sons in the steerage to aid in guiding the vessel, the children at Christmastide. comicbooks.com