Judge, 1912-03-30 · page 8 of 24
Judge — March 30, 1912 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This Judge magazine page contains two satirical pieces: **"Just an Oration"** (top): A senator's flattering speech to constituents is mocked through exaggerated praise ("finest flower of this great nation"). The satire targets politicians' empty rhetoric—the senator claims to have traveled globally meeting royalty and revolutionaries, yet speaks only in vapid platitudes about duty and intelligence. The biblical reference "Mene, mene, tekel, upharsin" (a warning of divine judgment) undercuts his reassurances. The joke is that such speeches manipulate audiences through hollow compliments while saying nothing substantive. **"An Exclusive Snapshot"** (center): A caption jokes that polar explorer Captain Amundsen's reception committee at the South Pole wore silk hats despite extreme cold—absurdist humor poking fun at formal dignity in impossible circumstances. **"A Lingering Suspicion"** (bottom): A father and son discuss what they're "not afraid of"—thunder, lightning, tigers—but Billy slyly suggests they *are* afraid of mother. This gentle domestic humor reflects early 20th-century gender dynamics, where wives held domestic authority over husbands.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE NIGH HORsE—" Look, Charlie, we ‘re right in style."* Just ADIES and gentlemen—As I gaze int your intelligent faces to-night, the knowledge that I belong to a coun- try that can boast of such intelligent people fills me with an exalting sense of pride. You are the finest flower of this Breat nation. (Applause.) I have traveled over the entire world, from Afghanistan to Nova Scotia, from San Salvador to Rio de Janeiro, from Keokuk, Ia., to Little Rock, Ark. I have met kings, queens, princes, princesses, czars, emperors, magnates, finan- ciers, nabobs, and dukes. I have scouted with the Boy Scouts, suf- fered with the suffragettes, dined with foreign dynasties, revolved with revolutionists, and associated with socialists. I have even hob- nobbed with hoboes. But never —lI give you my solemn word— never have I looked into such in- telligent faces as confront me to- night. (Prolonged applause.) My friends, I congratulate you. You are the backbone of this country. Upon you depends the fate of this republic. When the time comes for you to do your duty, will you fail? No, certainly not! I hope that that time will never come; but, if it does, you will be found fight- ing shoulder to shoulder for the common an By SENATOR SPREADEAGLE cause. (Applause and cries of ‘‘Hear, hear!"") And so, my friends, you have my en- tire confidence that you will be equal to any emergency, however great, how- ever fraught with evil, however perilous AN EXCLUSIVE SNAPSHOT. This is the first and only photograph of the reception committee that greeted Captain Amundsen at the South Pole excessive cold in the polar regions all the animals wear silk hats. to the sacred institutions which our forefathers established. When the time comes for you to be weighed in the balance, you will not be found wanting. “‘Mene, mene, tekel, upharsin,’’ will never be written of this audience. (Tremendous applause. ) And so, my friends, I want you to On account of the Oration. take this thought home with you to- night. No matter what storms may come, no matter what crises may arise, no matter what tribulations may beset the nation, no matter how hard the bur- dens of existence may bear down upon you and yours, no matter what demagogues may try to deflect you from the paths of duty and right- eousness, do not, I pray you from the bottom of my heart, do not allow your intelligence to be im- posed upon. (Thunderous ap- plause.) A Lingering Suspicion. A sudden thunderclap sent lit- tle Billy running to his father with a scared whimper. ‘‘Come, said pa. ‘Be brave! Be come! aman!’" As they sat together on the veranda, Billy boldly declared, “Us men aren't 'fraid of nothin’, are us, pa?’’ **Why, of course not, sonny!"’ “Thunder 'n’ lightnin’, 'n’ bugglers, 'n’ lines, ’a’ tigrums, nor nothin’, are us, pa?” “Nothing at all, Billy, boy.’” A pause; then Billy looked up with a sly face and said, ‘‘Aren’t us ’fraid of ma, neither, pa?’’ comicbooks.com