Judge, 1912-02-17 · page 7 of 24
Judge — February 17, 1912 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple satirical pieces from Judge, a humor magazine: **"The Smith Reform"** satirizes Progressive Era reform movements. The poem lists diverse names (Irish, German, Middle Eastern, Black) alongside traditional American names, then notes "there wasn't any John"—suggesting reformers excluded ordinary American citizens from their initiatives. The satire implies Progressive reforms were exclusionary or focused on outsiders rather than native-born Americans. **Other brief jokes** mock social pretensions ("Fact and Fancy"), exploit ethnic/racial stereotypes (the giraffe keeper joke), and make innuendo about women's fashion ("An Acute Angle"). **"Strangest Case on Record"** satirizes social climbing: a man's relatives marry into aristocracy and marry entertainers, yet he's still not wealthy enough for Senate—the real "stranger" is a politician who isn't rich. **"Gungywamp Liftin'"** uses rural dialect humor, joking that a minister injured himself lifting—implying the church contribution box is too light to cause injury. The overall tone reflects Judge's upper-class perspective, blending political satire with class-based and ethnic humor typical of early 20th-century American publications.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Eacu- ‘The Smith Reform. By WILLIAM J LAMPTON HERE was Hiram Smith, of Smith- ville, And Jim and Dave and Lon, And Zeke and Bije and Dannel; But there wasn’t any Juhn. There was Patrick, Yansen, Carlo, And de and van and von, And Sambo, Abdul, Moses; But there wasn’t any John. There was Algernon and Wi’ And Harry, Fred, and Don, And Susan Jane, and Sadie; But there wasn’t any John. There was Colonel, Judge, and Doctor, And Sheriff, Squire, and Hon., And Reverend and Professor; But there wasn’t any John. For, lo! the Smiths of Smithville Had fixed their minds upon Progressive reformation, So there wasn’t any John. Fact and Fancy. “Great Scott, Maria, that’s a daring dress!’’ “It’s a fancy costume.”? ‘‘Well, if I were you, I would stick a littie closer to fact.”” -" IF I WERE IN H/S BOOTS ID BE HAPPY’ Zoology. ‘Does it cost much to feed the giraffes?” “No; you see, a little goes a long way with them.” AN ACUTE ANGLE ‘Father says this low-cut gown shows very bad ¥e Do you think so? “On the contrary, it shows very good form."” Disproving an Adage. “This show makes me tired,”’ said Boreleigh. ‘‘I don’t think there is any- thing new under the son." “Perhaps not,’’ replied Mrs. Bore- leigh; ‘‘but, unless I am greatly mis- taken, Robert is sitting on your new opera hat.”” Strangest Case on Record. His daughter’s the wife of an English earl, And her mother is growing fat; His son has married a chorus girl, But there’s nothing strange in that. In the Senate there is a vacant seat; They are going to send him there. His case is one you could never beat— He isn’t a millionaire. Gungywamp Liftin’. Hank Stubbs—** Heerd they warn’t no services in church last Sunday.’’ Bige Miller—‘‘Thet so! What wuz the reason?”’ Honk Stubbs—‘‘Said the minister hurt his back liftin’ on a box.” Bige Miller—Guess it warn’t the contrybewtion box.’* comicbooks.com