Judge — February 10, 1912 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

(Continued from preceding pate) were listening intently, Senator Kern, of Indiana, was called out into the mar- ble room by a man who said he was from Elwood, Ind., and who wished to negoti- ate a loan of fifty cents. The Senator shelled out the half dollar and hurried back to hear the debate. His seat is close to that of Senator Shively, of the same State, and a mo- ment later his attention was attracted by a page handing a card to Mr. Shively, followed by the latter’s immediate exit from the chamber. When Shively re- turned a minute or two later, Kern crossed over and sat down by his side. “How much did you get touched for, Shi 2" he asked. “T was called out by a friend from El- wood, who asked for the loan of a dol- lar,"’ said Shively very seriously. “Are you sure he is your friend?’’ asked Kern. “I suppose so; he said he was,’’ was the reply. “Did you ever see him before?” “IT can’t recall that I ever did.’’ “Well, the same man is my friend, too; he just worked me for fifty cents,”” said Kern. The loans floated by the man from El- wood on that day are still floating. a If a man would write to his member of Congress for an elephant, the latter would hardly express surprise. A re- quest for anything is liable to find its way to the Capitol. Not long ago Sen- ator Reed Smoot got a hurry call from Utah for some tobacco-plant seed. The constituent wrote that ‘‘either Bull Dur- ham or Battle Axe’’ would be acceptable. Why He Thought So. “Pop! “Yes, my son.’* “You know my teacher?”’ “Yes."" “I mean my day-school teacher?”’ “Yes, I know.’” ‘Do you know him pretty well?’” “Yes, pretty well.”” “*Well, was he ever a little boy?”” “Why, of course he was!’’ “T thought so, pop.’” “Why did you think so?”” “‘Because he asks so many questions.’” —Yonkers Statesman. A Winner.—‘‘Boy, take these flowers to Miss Bertie Bohoo, Room 12.’" “My, sir! you’re the fourth gentle- man wot’s sent her flowers to-day !’’ “What’s that? What the deuce? W-who sent the others?’’ “Oh, they didn’t send any names. They all said, ‘She’ll know where they come from.’’’ “‘Well, here, take my card and tell her these are from the same one who sent the other three boxes.’’—Red Hen, When Your Eyes Need Care Try Murine Eye Remedy CHICAGO The Cost of Purity exceeds all other Costs in of, LW We spend more on purity —more time, more skill and more money than on any other cost in our brewing. We sterilize every tub, vat, tank—we scald every barrel— every pipe and pump—every time we use it. We wash every bottle four times by machinery. The air in which the beer is cooled is filtered. Every bottle of Schlitz is sterilized, after it is sealed, by a process invented by Pasteur. Light starts decay even in pure beer. gives protection against light. The Brown Bottle protects Schlitz purity from the brewery to your glass. Dark glass If you knew what we know about beer, you would say “Schlitz — Schlitz in Brown Bottles.” Order a case from your dealer today. See that crown or cork is branded “‘Schlitz” The Beer That Made Milwaukee Famous..« A Valuable Haul.—'‘You say your jewels were stolen while the family was at dinner?”’ “No, no! This is an important rob- bery, officer. Our dinner was stolen while we were putting on our jewels.”’ —Pittsburgh Post, In Tripolii—‘We had to notify the soldiers to hurry up and get through that last battle.”’ ‘*What was the trouble?’’ “The moving-picture films gave out.’” —St. Louis Times. Emphatic.—‘‘Speaking of etiquette, did you send the dollar for those adver- tised instructions on ‘What To Do at Table’?”’ “Yes,’? “And what did you get?” “‘A slip with one word printed on it: ‘Eat!’ "’—Boston Transcript. In answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will be appreciated. Lack of _ Evidence. — Stranger —‘‘Is there a good criminal lawyer in your town?’" Native—‘‘Wall, everybody thinks we've got one, but they ain’t been able to prove it on. him.’’—Cleveland Plain Dealer. comicbooks.com