Judge, 1911-10-28 · page 18 of 24
Judge — October 28, 1911 — page 18: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple unrelated humor pieces typical of early 20th-century satirical magazines: **Top cartoon**: A woman chases a child with a rolling pin, captioned "Come back here, ye coward!"—domestic humor about childhood mischief and parental discipline. **"Classic"**: Jokes about daughters' musical abilities—one sings loudly and unintelligibly, the other plays piano with crossed hands. Satirizes Victorian-era daughters' musical training. **"Music and War"**: Contrasts the hurdy-gurdy street musician (peacetime) with the machine-gun operator (wartime), reflecting early 20th-century militarism concerns. **"Recipe for Political Success"**: References "Uncle Joe" Cannon (likely Speaker Joseph Cannon), presenting cynical advice about political non-commitment and ambiguity—"be round like a junk bottle" so people can't see your true positions. **Other pieces**: Include dating advice ("Diplomacy"), medical "prescriptions" for various ailments, and short quips about football, money, and farm advertising. The page demonstrates Judge's mix of domestic satire, political commentary, and general humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Classic. ND are your daughters musical?"’ we ask. “*I guess so,"’ he re- phes rather sadly. “One of "em can sing things at the top of her voice so you can’t understand a word, and the other can play the piano with her hands crossed."” Music and War. HE HAND that turned the handle Of the hurdy-gurdy trim, Now bravely turns the handle Of the gatling gun so grim. DIPLOMACY. ‘May I see your mother, miss ?"" “COMB BACK HERE, YE COWARD !” Prescriptions. Fo A LOVELORN youth who thinks so continually of his lady love that his work suffers grievously: One year of married life. Full portion of coal bills, light bills, water rent, food bills, clothes bills. One squalling child. For a young lady who is vain: Two dozen photos of herself doing household tasks in the morning. Three hours’ record on talking ma- chine of what her friends say about her. To be taken daily before meals. For a young man who, though wholly untrained, thinks he can sing when he really cannot: One-hour lesson with critical vocal teacher. If first dose does not cure, repeat until it kills or cures. The Search for a Man. By McLANDBURGH WILSON. OTHER always makes a search, Naught uncertain brooking; Takes a peep beneath the bed, For a burglar looking. Sister by the garden gate Always likes to hover When the dusk begins to fall, Looking for a lover. With his business gone to pot, Statesmen striking poses, Father scans the country through, Looking for a Moses, Evidence. De Style—*What makes you think he sympathizes with Italy?’’ Gunbusta—‘‘He has stopped taking his usual Turkish baths.’’ A BLUE ribbon, now and then, is cap- tured by the sporting man. renin —| Recipe for Political Success. «67 TNCLE JOE” CANNON teils of the advice given by a successful Western politician to his son when the latter had just been nominated for a State office. “‘Now, Bill,’’ said the old man ear- nestly, ‘‘I'll give you the secret of polit- ical success in a very brief formula. Lean a little toward everything; don’t commit yourself to anything. Be round, Bill, perfectly round—like a junk bottle —and just dark enough so that nobody can see what’s in you, and you'll get along, Bill."’ -A Great Game. ES, footbatl is the game for me— Excitement every minute; For when the players can’t agree, There's still more kicking in it. ONEY talks. Did you ever see a man’s head on a silver dollar? UP-TO-DATE UTILITY. Syurre— 1 see, Hiram, you have an auto- mobile advertisement on your farm.” Hiram—" Yes, squite, and it beats all what a scarecrow it makes. No dogs, chickens, pigs, ducks, cows, or any other stray nuisances, ever poke their heads beyond this fence.” comicbooks.com