Judge — October 7, 1911 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Foolish Eyes. By P. B. WILCOX. HE CAST her eyes about the room, They fell upon the floor; They lay there just a second, then She raised them to the door. “Oh my, what naughty eyes!’’ she cried, ‘As round the room they flew And met the glance of him, o'er there, As his eyes at her he threw. But bards can never e’en describe The meaning his eyes bore, And neither can they ever tell What cut him to the core. It may be that her eyes were sharp And, colored black or blue, Had read the message his eyes bore, When a glance at her he threw. Soft-soap Bubbles. T’S EASIER to borrow a five on a smile than a frown. A kind word to the live one is better than the finest epi- taph for the dead one. Every drummer is expected to carry a line of soft soap as a side line. Many aman has found soft soap often greases the slide to perdition. Doubtless some object to soft soap because of the “lye” in it. Almost any soap will give you a clean hand, but it takes soft soap to give you a glad hand. It is singular that farmers, who know the most about making soft soap, know the least about using it. — Vance C. Crim. Well Threatened. AT THE services one Sunday morning in a church for the colored folks of a Mississippi town, there was observed one dusky youngster accompanying his grandparents and sitting as wise as a young owl throughout the long sermon. At the close of the service somebody congratulated the grandfather upon the excellence of the child’s behavior. The grandfather smiled significantly. “Day boy is clways well threatened befo’ he goes in de church.’” Impossible. Rector—*But don't you think you girls ought to do something for the heathen?” "anny Fluffy—'*Goodness, rector, we can't take them out autoing, and they wouldn’t appreciate fudge, anyway !'" CLEANED OUT. Sawyer —"* Has your wife left your bed and board ?”" Nagby—'* Yes, that 's about all she has left me."’ Summer's Revenge. HE SUMMER left her in a mess; Old Sol has placed her ’neath the ban. Now, when she’d wear a low-neck dress, She finds she can’t get off the tan. “Move On!” «sT)ID YE see them big skyscrapers while ye was in New York, Silas?"” “Well, I seed the bottom part; but them blamed police fellers wouldn't let me stand still long enough to see clean to the tops."” Proper Color Tone. First freshman—" What's that Jap in our class studying for?”” Second freshman—'‘ Journalism. going into newspaper work.’” First freshman—'‘I don’t believe he will make a success of it.”” Second freshman—'Oh, yes, he will! He’s going to be a yellow journalist.” Not to His Liking. “Pow DID you enjoy your visit to your grand- father in the country, Rob?’’ “Oh, it was fine, ‘cept I had to wash my face and hands in raw water at the pump. I like it cooked best, like we have it at home.’’ He's Do You? SHOT an arrow in the air; It fell to earth I know not where, And, what is more, I do not care. comicbooks.com