Judge, 1911-08-19 · page 7 of 24
Judge — August 19, 1911 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several satirical pieces typical of early 20th-century American humor: **"These Percolative Days"** mocks modern convenience technology—specifically electric percolating coffee urns—through an old-fashioned narrator nostalgic for strong, traditionally-brewed coffee. The satire targets resistance to technological "progress" and changing household customs. **The horse-trading cartoon** at top satirizes nouveaux riches (represented by "Mrs. Newcash") who adopt fashionable standards without understanding them—she insists on buying only "wind-broken" horses, inverting normal logic about animal quality. **"Help Wanted"** and **"Oh, Mercy!"** are brief comedic vignettes about romantic entanglements and legal mishaps respectively. **"Game in Abundance"** plays on double meanings—conflating hunting "game" with parlor games (golf, bridge), suggesting the wealthy occupy themselves frivolously. Throughout, the humor targets modern affectations, social climbing, and the absurdities of contemporary manners among the affluent and fashionable classes—typical Judge magazine fare satirizing American society's anxieties about progress and propriety.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
These Percolative Days. By AUSTIN COOK. “[° GOOD old hard-boiled coffee My thought with fondness turns, Before the innovation Of the percolating urns. I loved the rich aroma As it came from mother’s pot, But in these percolative days, Alas! I know it not. So languidly I sit me down, And daintily I sip The weak, insipid fluid That is only ‘lowed to drip. I fear I am old-fashioned, NOT UP TO STANDARD. The dealer—"' Well, he 's sixteen years old, mum, I'll admit that ; but he ain't wind-broke nor nothin’."’ Mrs. Newcash (who has decided not to buy) —'* We 're very sorry, bat we would not care to buy a horse that was not thoroughly wind-broken."’ HELP WANTED. YOUNG MAN of twenty-three years of age finding himself suddenly and without warning engaged to a maiden lady of forty-seven, with per- oxide hair. a mother younger than herself, and four brothers of a pugilistic disposition, will pay liberally for HELP. Any kind of help that will get him out of his present position willdo and no questions asked. Innocence, Box 23, Narragansett Heights. A la College. HEN stood on the river bank And gave her college ery, Until a frog, in pained surprise, Politely asked her why. She said, ‘Kind sir, you see that duck Out there upon the water? Well, that’s the college win- ning crew, And I'm its alma mater.’"" Oh, Mercy! “THE LAST time I had news from Jessica,"’ re- marked a friend, ‘‘she had a busy time in the courts. She was suing a union for some- But it fairly makes me mad thing or other and a young To be obliged to cater to This percolating fad. man for breach of promise. How did she make out?”” The Retort Convalescent. Jessica’s brother grinned. “‘Why, she won her breach of Hospital interne—‘‘Are you in pain, my man?” Patient (irritably) —‘‘Aw, GAME IN ABUNDANCE. promise suit,’’ he replied; “‘but she lost her union suit.’” He—"* Just back from the mountains? Was there any game there ?"" She—'‘ Game? I should say so! We played golf all day and bridge half the night."” I'm in bed an’ the pain seems ter be in me!’’ ‘HE RECKLESS chauffeur is never wreckless, comicbooks.com