Judge — May 27, 1911 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

I T ey Wo. oe Os A Proper Decision. Pa JUDGE in California has ruled that poker is not the great American game. JupGE overrules him without waiting to hear ar- guments. Our history * teems with instances of famous poker games. Bret Harte and his Heathen Chinee have immortalized poker. Robert €. Schenck, while serving as United States minister to England, introduced poker there and it was forthwith cata- logued as the great American game, with Schenck as its expositor. To assert ju- diciously that poker is not our great American game is to go contrary to the facts of history, to the measured tread of the feet of poetry, and to the deci- sions of diplomats. That California judge has earned a recall. A Petticoated Cop. NLY last year women were given the ballot in the State of Washing- ton. Plainly the revolution in that State does not go backward. Seattle authori- ties have decided that women shall be eligible to appointment on the police force. The next vacancy will be filled by a woman, and a civil-serv- ice examination will be held for candidates. The fortunate (or étherwise) woman who will get the appointment ought togive some time to reflection before she has her uniform made, not only on the subject of that uniform, but on other matters. First, she should bear in mind the Gilbert aphorism that a policeman’s lot is not always a happy one. It may be pleasant for a police officer to have the free run of Italian fruit stands or to knock at the side doors of saloons, but there are occasions when one may be called on to chase a bur- glar over house roofs, or to quell a Biack Hand riot, or to go toa fire and get drenched. However, the first woman police officer of Seattle will have a sure thing on getting her picture, entirely surrounded by pure reading matter, in the daily Papers. La, A Grand-stand Play at That. ARTER HARRISON, in assuming the office of mayor of Chicago, il- lustrated Jeffersonian simplicity in a manner that leaves Jefferson’s record second. Mr. Harrison refused an escort to the city hall, made no speech on taking office. He just took office and that was all, Come to think of it, that wasn’t all. He had the reporters all on hand to note his simplicity and to chronicle it for an admiring country. It is safe to say that Mr. Harrison does not look so simple as he acts. In his way he is a very shrewd politician. Chicago people are saying that he has hopes that next year the Democrats will make him their leader in the national campaign. Be that as it may, he is not now leading a simple life as mayor of Chicago. All the patronage that goes with his posi- tion are being used for the improvement of his political fortunes. THE GENESIS OF NICKNAMES. How Will was changed into Bill. ‘owe a Fam ‘ose Caustic Comment. [LONDON expects to have ten thousand American visitors at the coronation of King George, and it hopes that these Americans will spend $25,000,000 during the festivities. Why will Americans be so numerous and so extravagant at the coronation? Not ten of the ten thousand can give a reason satisfactory even to themselves. Americans who will stay at home bid farewell with regret to the departing $25,000,000, which could bes pent here with very great advantage to business. a Report has it that many of the soldier boys sent to San Antonio have become subject to attacks of dizziness and of wondering whether they have got them again or not, all on account of the river that winds through the city. The stream seems to them to be ubiquitous. There is water, water everywhere. Men have been known, after walking through the city and inevitably getting back to the river, to make a high resolve to walk directly away from it in a straight line, only to find their efforts ended by discov- ering themselves to be on its banks after a few minutes’ walking. In San An- tonio, death, taxes, and the river cannot be escaped. Even when they are not in the line of vision, they are always near. a Five meals a day is the latest cure suggested for obesity. A physician is credited with advising it. It carries out the idea that in this world things go by contraries. Three meals aday make some peo- ple fat. Five meals will render them thin. Possibly two meals a day will make thin people take on flesh, one will give them greater weight in the community, and none at all will make any one fat enough for dime-museum exhibi- tion purposes. a The proposal for a national for- est between Baltimore and Washington is overdoing the for- estry business. There must be some room left in the country for the inhabitants. comicbooks.com