Judge, 1911-02-11 · page 10 of 24
Judge — February 11, 1911 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains light satirical humor typical of early 20th-century American magazines. The cartoons mock social pretensions and gender dynamics of the era: **"The Lover's Hope"** satirizes a poor suitor—his would-be father-in-law dismisses him, telling him to "live on hope" since he won't support him financially. **"The Comforts of a Telephone"** jokes about the annoyance of early telephone technology, showing someone reluctant to answer late-night calls from demanding callers (notably, a newlywed woman expecting her neighbor to help with her baby). **"The Title-seeker"** mocks wealthy American heiresses' desperation for aristocratic titles and their commercial desperation—here one needs a catchy book title for her manuscript. **"A Foregone Conclusion"** satirizes how a man secured employment through marriage rather than merit, making him permanently subordinate to his wife's father. Other brief pieces joke about peroxide hair dye, impractical women, and the pretense of flashing "Confederate money" to impress waiters. A final quip suggests women capable of controlling dogs deserve voting rights—gentle suffrage commentary.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Lover's Hope. By 8. B. KISER. LIVE on hope,” the lover cried, While kneeling at the maiden’s feet; “Though now my pleas are all denied, I still shall live on hope, my sweet!" “Go, live on hope,”’ her father said, For he had heard the lover’s plea; “If hope will save you, go ahead, For you shall never live on me. THE COMFORTS OF A TELEPHONE. 1, ‘Confound it! there goes that telephone, and the I've half a mind temperature ten degrees below zero. to let it ring. — 2. —— Br-r-r-r, wow! gee! it's cold getting out of a warm bed. But I suppose that ‘phone has got to be answered must be something very important or they wouldn't call me up this time o' night.'” 3. Soft, sweet feminine voice on *phone—"' How do you do, Newwed. Would you mind running around the comer and telling ma to come right over? Mr. Softmark. This is Mrs. Baby has 2 new tooth.” The Title-seeker. oe TITLE! A title! My fortune for a title!’’ sobbed the great American heiress, in anguished ac- cents, (Now, I pray of you, do not jump at a conclusion and launch into a dia- tribe on the folly of the American heiress offering all she has for a glit- tering title. The lady in question had just finished the manuscript of what she supposed would prove the sensational book of the year, and knowing that its success and her fame would depend very largely on a vividly suggestive title, she made the above agonized offer. That is all.) Dyed. BOTTLE of peroxide, Sprinkled here and there, Makes her raven tre: Look » golden h: A Foregone Conclusion. ee RONSON doesn’t seem to me to be aman of much force. I have often wondered how he ever managed to get the job he holds.”” “Don't you know? He married it. His wife's father is the president of the com- pany he is connected with.’’ “Oh, that’s it! Married it, eh? Then he, of course, can never be master of that Tt situation."” Impractical. 66Q HE SEEMS to be rath- er impractical, it seems to me."’ “Yes, very. Why, she would be silly enough to sup- pose that a self-made man might be brought up on a chafing dish.’’ Voice or Cereal ? Ss a song of sixpence, Pocket full of rye. Which for cultivation Would you rather try? ‘ THE OPTIMIST gets up in the world; the pessi- mist gets down on it. THAT HIGH NOTE. A Crimson Feather Duster. By M. 2. BUHLER. wat wind of destiny has blown thee, little feathered thing, Whose spirit from dim spheres unknown crosses my journeying? Thy soul upon its winged way has van- ished like a gus’ Thy gorgeous plumage yet doth stay, lightly to lift the dust! How To Give Pleasure to Waiters. 66RQUT WHY,” we ask of the indi- vidual with the loud vest and the shrieking cravat, ‘‘do you always flash that big roll of Confederate money wrapped in two ten-dollar bills when you order luncheon?’” “My boy,”” he answers kindly, ‘I don’t do that for my own gratification. The waiter has an hour of the greatest pride and pomp, thinking that he is serving a plutocrat. Surely you would not criticise me for my little act of men- tal philanthropy !”” HEN aman observes a woman who can make a dog mind, he is usu- ally satisfied that here, at least, is one woman who could be trusted to vote. comicbooks.com