Judge — December 17, 1910 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Hardened. Scott—‘‘Is it true that Cooleigh is finan- | cially embarrassed?” | Mott—‘‘He’s fearfully. in debt, but. it | doesn’t seem to embarrass him much.’’— Boston Transcript. The Limit: “Do you have much trouble with your automobile?” “Trouble! Say, I couldn’t have more if I was married to the blamed machine."’— St. Louis Star. His Wife. “What do you do for'a living, Mose?” “T's de manager ob a laundry."’ “What's the name of this laundry?” “Eliza Ann.’’—Louisville Courier-Jour- nal. . The Way of Life. ‘*Yes,”’ said the self-made millionaire, “I was happier when I was poor.”” “But it’s an easy matter for you to be- come poor again,’’ we protested, “True,"’ he rejoines ‘but I'd rather be envied than snubbed. "’—Chicago News. RSS 4 7 4, G JUDGE The Executive Calf. The White House calf is now no more; The veally bleat is stilled. Its fame has stretched from shore to shore, And countless columns filled. Above this interrupted stew They moralize and fuss— Which I am sure they'll never do For any one of us. —Cleveland Plain Dealer. The Difference. “My brains are my capital,’’ said the conceited young man. “By the way,’’ remarked an innocent by- stander, ‘‘can you tell me what is the prin- cipal difference between you and some of the railroads of this country?" “*No. What is it?” “‘Lunderstand that they are overcapital- ized.""—Chicago Record-Herald. Foolish Query. A Kentucky girl has been kissed ten thousand times and sighs for more, while an Illinois woman had a man arrested for ing her once. In which State would you rather live?—Philadelphia Inquirer. BX FINE FEATHERS, ETC. Mrs. Goore—"*Mercy! who was with us only this morning ?"" Mrs. Hen (spitefully) — see she always padded to the limit."” Principle and Interest. The plutocrat and the socialist confronted each other in determined opposition. “T,"’ said the socialist, ‘‘am fighting for my principle.”” “‘And I,"’ said the plutocrat, ‘‘am fight- ing for my interest.'’—Baltimore American. Hunch! The man who acts without a thought be- cause his hunch is strong May get results, like driving nails when nails are started wrong. —Dallas News. Mutual Disposition. “My wife and I had another foolish quar- rel.” “‘About what?” ‘About where we would go if we had money enough to travel.”"—Washington Herald. Definition and Drawback. Inspiration may be defined as something that will come to-morrow when’ you feel | more like working.— Peoria Mercia Tran- | script. ot ‘That can't possibly be dear, plump Mrs. Turkey ‘Certainly it is, Anyone with half an eye could Phonographic Men. Some men are like phonographs; every day they reel off exactly the same records. —Montreal Star. A Slump in Price. ll give you two dollars for this anec- dote about Julius Cesar.’’ “‘What’s the matter with you?” de- manded the hack writer. ‘‘You gave me four dollars for that anecdote when it was about Roosevelt.’’—Spokesman-Review. Just the Thing. Willie—‘‘Here’s a sign I got from the post-office.’” Mrs. Slimson—'‘Why, Willie! What do you mean? It’s the sign, ‘For Transients.’ You just take it right back.”’ Willie—‘I thought you might like to hang it up in your kitchen.”"—Life. He—'‘Would you be satisfied to give up your present beautiful home and live ina little white cottage?’’ She—‘'I might, if there was a little red automobile hitched in front of ies door. "’— Montreal Star. : LPEPET EEE E ETE TEE ETE T ET ET. wnstose toctosbte The it Exquisite’ Cordial H of the Centuries LIQUEUR Peres -_ -GREEN AND YELLOW-— At fint-clay_ Wine Merchants, Cave, Het. Buitjer & Co., ork, N. Scis Abenu tor Usted Sues Natural Laxative Water Recommended by Physicians Refuse Substitutes Best remedy for CONSTIPATIO AT ALL DauvccisTs "BEFORE ‘XOY VACUUM CLEANER INVESTIGATE THE THURMAN Roatiet, “I Can Make Tours a Dustless Home” Free Upon Request Gen'l Comp. Air & Vacuum Machy. Co. ‘ST. LOUIS, U.8 A. ROMEIKE’S Pret Cattios Berean will send you all newspaper clippings which may appear about you, your friends. or any, subject on which you may want to be “up to date.” Every ical of importance in the vee ted States and Europe is searc! rms, $5. tet Saree eh Tee’ Roueixe, 110112 West 20th Street, New York. HENRY LINDENMEYR & SONS PAnE® WAREHOUSE joa, 2, 34 and 36 Bleecker Street, Branch Warchovse, 20 Beekman Street New York ALL KINNS OP PAPER MADE TO ORDER. JUDGE'S LIBRARY becember AT ALL NEWS-STANDS. 10¢. | | 10¢ In answering ativertisements please menticn JUDGE. It will be appreciated. comicbooks.com