Judge — November 26, 1910 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE'S ALPHABET FOR BASEBALL FANS HARRY ZIMMERMAN. OF THE CHICAGO NATIONALS. IS FOR Zimmerman, He's one of Chance's boys, His fielding is considered “slick,” Hard “‘clouts"’ to him are toys. Chicago 's long admired his work, Abroad he's liked as well ‘The reason is, he’s ‘‘on the job,"* As all the fans can tell. The Genesis of It. “I wonder why the English settlers came to name the town ‘Boston.’ ’” “Probably because it began with ‘B.""" ‘*What has that to do with it?”” “Well, that’s the beginning of ‘beans,’ you know."’—Catholic Times. Prevention of Cruelty to Children. “Gee!'’ says the first little boy. ‘I hate to go home! My mamma always wants to give me a bath every evening.” “So does mine,”’ says the second little 7 but I don’t mind it. My papa isa doctor, and she always gets him to chloro- form me, so I never know a thing about it until it is all over."’—Canada Monthly. Nothing More. “T hear you fellows are wasting a lot of money on that Panama Canal."’ “Nothing to it! We are simply trying to make both ends meet."’—Pittsburgh Post. Health and Income. BOTH KEPT UP ON SCIENTIFIC FOOD. Good, sturdy health helps one a lot to make money. With the loss of health one’s income is liable to shrink, if not entirely dwindle away. When a young lady has to make her own living, good health is her best asset. “Tam alone in the world,”’ writes a Chi- cago girl, ‘dependent on my own efforts for my living. I ama clerk, and about two years ago, through close application to work and a boarding-house diet, I became a nerv- ous invalid and got so bad off it was almost impossible for me to stay in the office a half day at a time. “A friend suggested to me the idea of trying Grape-Nuts food, which I did, mak- ing ita large part of at least two meals a day. “To-day I am free from brain tire, dys- pepsia, and all the ills of an overworked and improperly nourished brain and body. To Grape-Nuts I owe the recovery of my health and the ability to retain my position and income.’’ Read ‘‘The Road to Wellville,"’ in pack- ages. ‘‘There’s a Reason." Ever read the above letter? Anew one appears from time to time. They are genuine, true, and full of human interest. in answering advertisements please mention JUDGE. It will JUDGE Fierce Annoyance. | | “Lives there a man with soul so dead | Who never to himself has said,"” | “I wish my whiskers wouldn't grow! To shave them off upsets me so. Birmingham Age-Herald. Or one with soul so cold and numb He could not find his voice to roar, “T'll break that feller’s back, by gum! That never thinks to close the door."’ —Springfield Union. Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup the best remedy for their children, 25¢ a bottle. An Uumistakable Hint. “Young Staylate got a delicate hint from the young lady he was calling on the other evening.’ “What was it?" “*She found looking at the clock and other familiar devices useless, so she ordered | some refreshments, and her mother sent in a plate of breakfast food.’’—Baltimore American, Queer. A dollar isa peculiar thing. The farther it gets away from you the larger it looks. Springfield Republican. THE EFFECTS OF TRAVEL. “* It beats all how terrible a long journey makes one look."’ —Megyendorfer Blactter Peculiar. “Rather a peculiar chap, isn’t he? “Yes. He never asks for aisle seats when he applies at the box office of a theater and he always neglects to demand a lower when he engages a berth ina sleeper.” —Chicago Record-Herald. Apologies to Mother Goose. Old Mother Hubbard, She went to the cupboard, As always had been her habit. “Tecan’t afford a She murmured with grie! So she made her poor dog a Welsh rabbit. New York Telegram. Crushing News. “What are you doing with the crutch?"" “Taking it home for my little boy. “What happened to him?” “While he was bringing home the mail a Sunday paper fell on his leg.’’—Youngs- | town Telegram. | paying his street-car fare whene Egyptian Deities “The Utmost in Cigarettes” Before the feast, after thefeast always Cork Tips or rain A Severe Critic. The defaulting bank cashier has no harsher critic than the man who dodges er he has the chance. 1 Orleans Picayune. On His Guard. Teacher (to new pupil)*—"*Why did Han- nibal cross the Alps, my little man?”” My little man—"*For the same reason as the ’en crossed the road. Yer don’t catch me with no puzzles."". Sydney Bulletin. Soaring. “She married an old man who is very rich “I went one better on that. young aviator who is a millionaire.” Mele. I married a Pele Official Encouragement. “Every time the automobile breaks down I notice you examine your State license.’’ “Ido that for encouragement. The li- s I’m competent to operate the Houston Chronicle, Five Atchison women hired a rig yester- day and went out in the country, where they had quite an adventure; while in a pasture picking up walnuts, a farmer's dog barked at them. —Atchison Globe, Pears’ A soft, fine grained skin is a valued possession. Pears’ Soap gives title to ownership. Established in be appreciated. comicbooks.com