Judge — February 5, 1910 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Aa E| *| TAs EDITED BY CONTRIBUTORS. AN INVENTIVE GENIUS. By SE. RISER, “ HAT ever became of Sim Watson?” asked the man who had returned to the little old town after the lapse of many years. )) ** Do you see that big buildin’ up yonder on the hill?’’ replied the cld settler. ** You don't mean to tell me that is the home of little Sim Watson, who was always at the foot of his class in school."" “Yep. I guess you could find him there right now if you was to go up and ask. You see, Sim got to be a great hand for inventin’ things. The first invention he ever invented was a shoebrush that would go by turnin’ a crank, and he might have made a fortune out of it if he had only fixed it so that the brush could have been tilted. Bein’ stationary, it would only brush the tops of the shoes; and, besides that, there were some other drawbacks, one of which was that the first time Sim ever tried it the chain broke, one end hittin’ him just below the right eye and nearly puttin’ it out. After that, he invented a flyin’ machine. That came purty nigh endin’ his career, too. Only thing saved him was that Dave Henderson's oldest boy wanted to gu upon the thing first. Sim was sweet on one of Dave's girls at the time, and I guess he thought it would be a good way to get in with the family by lettin’ the boy try the flyin’ machine. After that he’ “+ But did he get the girl?” “*Well, no; but I don’t think Dave laid up any grudge against him. He had a big family left, anyway. Sim's next invention was a dish- washin’ machine that was to be operated by adog on a tread- mill. There was great excite- ment when folks found out about it, and a man came down from the city to look at the thing. He was representin’ a company with a lot of money, that was goin’ to take it up‘ Curse the luck!"" says Failure; and push it if it was all right."” go ee “And Sim bright EBC cap Mocks ach While my lucky neighbor enough to prevent them from Daily reaps success !"* cheating him out of the profits that his i How much do you suppose he is worth Cheer up, Mr. Failure TT Life's a building game! self and that which your Rear rour efforts, towering, Till the next one, flowering, vention brought, eh? ** Worth? He ain’t worth nothin’. “But I thought you said he lived in that fine building up on the hill **He does. That's our new poorhouse.”’ IT HAS HAPPENED. By TUDOR JENKS 8 a MS. to a chosen Ed., king he'll become a very willing Cred., he'll mark the MS. with a big O. K., Or with ‘* Ace.,”’ according to his way, And that thereupon you'll be sure to get a Pretty little cl k to pay some pressing Dr., It’s really disappointing to have it marked ** F And often makes an author just a bit Dej. WHAT WORRIES JACK. Mildred —** Every time Jack calls on me he appears worried, and I feel sure it's because the poor fellow can't screw up the courage to ask for my hand."* Jealous girl friend—" Yes; it probably worries him to have the sentence hanging over him !""— Charts Cormac Mullin RIGHTEOUSNESS. ITTLE Jack Horner sat in a corner, Eating his daily lunch; He looked at the crowd, And he snorted out loud, “I''m the only good boy in the bunch!"” ro. Charles Irvin Juntin INFORMATION WANTED. Mrs, Benham—"1 wish you would explain one thing about this tariff question. Benham—** Let her go. Mrs. Benham—" How does a tariff on raw materials affect the price of breakfast food: HI Horton 3 rating you give your- friends give you somehow Blossoms into fame. never equalize.—c.c Burees Johnson comicbooks:com