Judge — October 23, 1909 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HOW IT HAPPENED. ITTLE BINKS had L taken his place in the barber's chair, and the latter, after putting on his bib and sharpening his razor, started in to lather his cheeks. “Your face is very badly scraped," said th barber, pausing and bri dishing his brush over Binks's nose. Yes," said Binks. “The fact is, the last fel- low that shaved me wasn’t any kind of a barber at all.” “1 should say not,"* returned the barber, drop- ping a small sud in Binks's eye,‘ His work suggests that he was 2) * Yep ment of for a hosiery establishme of spring poetry. riders, captains of inc “Well, to begin with ondly,"* said Binks, if I shaved myself t! manicured while I waited A WANDERING MEMORY. asking me if I wanted him todo it, he wh and started on his work of carn Vd hi fresh guy to into th wasn't any up and let -why not?" said Binks. “Well, it's a wonder he didn’t cut your he: psuds in Binks’s « sirree, I wouldn't I draw istry or militia ** Then why should you let al: . always belie in this at once Iw re you doing? Can't you see whe arber. “A closer insy nd T thought I'd shave Siape. ANOTHER DISCOVERY. EARY, Peary, Bold and cheery, Went to find the Pole. Found it, too, Up in the blue, Where the ice flocs roll. And while the day Was raw, they say, When round about he looked, Peary, Peary, Worn and weary, Found the Pole was Cooked! PREPARING IN ADVANCE. “gt SH!" says the stalwart guard at the front gate of the eminent statesman’s residence in Lincoln, Neb. “Don't go in there, Don't make a noise, ple Mr. Bryan is at work upon an im: portant pclitical document and cannot be disturbed “* What is he writing?” we ask, with eager curi- osity. “The airship plank for the platform of 1912."" N THE trolley-car electricity is everywhere dom- inant. The motorman sparks with the pretty girls on the sidewalks, the passengers are charged for their trip, and while they're talking on the current subjects the conductor short-cir- cuits a lot of the nickels. Thad fore at Scott! it's very sin can't rber, as very much in need of a shave, and, without yped out a razor, lathered me from my ears to my ch J you see what happe If my beauty was only skin clare !"" ejaculated the barber, ‘* He must have been a pretty rab you that way. I don't see how he managed to get you down chair unless you let him push you over.”” “ Hedidn't, Binks. Tstood up during the whole proceeding. air within a mile of us to push me “Well, There m serape, ** You mean tosay he shaved you standing ?"’ demanded the barber scornfully. ald the barber, putting a fresh consign- srgyman shave you? Or a plumber? “Neither would T let a drummer nt shi -car conductor nor a writer th ace at the mercy of banke el-keepers, circus rf. Would you le r life,"* returned Binks. not on * demanded the barber. in going tova lawyer to get me out of a , and sec- rease Th wyer who did the job. IT thought aidn't hav prush-boy, or nave my na a tiresome discussion of the tariff—pubf—pluff—here, what going? You've filled my mouth with lather! ion of your face shows that you have about three off from the inside or listen pay a BILLIKEN <[Tanes-as-tHey}: “CRACKING A SMILE.” 4. Ah, met My distinetly, WHAT EVERY HOUSE. KEEPER KNOWS. HAT she is easily the best in the neigh- borhood. That money doesn't go half the distance that it used to. That it is impossible to clean carpets with an egg-beater. That nowadays girls are not properly taught how to keep hous That housekee would be v nye if it cent servants, That the servants ought to pay her for clean- ing up after them ELLs 0, JONES Now. are get- ting the head, in- comichooks, com