Judge, 1909-08-14 · page 6 of 16
Judge — August 14, 1909 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes early 20th-century fascination with Mars and extraterrestrial life. The main feature, "Extracts from the Martian Daily News," inverts perspective: Martian scientists observe Earth with the same bemused condescension Europeans applied to "primitive" cultures. The joke targets several contemporary concerns: Earth's industrial pollution (detected as gasoline odor), human irrationality, and vanity. Martians mock earthlings' attempts at communication via mysterious "flashes" (likely referencing actual astronomical observations), dismissing us as "dodgasted zaniacs." The framing cartoon ("Expert Advice") and accompanying illustrations appear to be unrelated Judge humor about conventional social situations—courtship and fashion—providing typical satirical commentary on manners and propriety. The satire ultimately mocks human self-importance: if intelligent Martians existed, they'd find us absurd and dangerous rather than interesting. This reflects contemporary anxiety about industrial modernity and humanity's place in a potentially populated cosmos.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
EXPERT ADVICE. “It's my corwbe ter be a cowboy, hey ? Tensterfoot Core puncher—" Come o Well, 1 reckon you ’d make a better milkmaid,” EXTRACTS FROM THE MARTIAN DAILY NEWS HEAVY cyclone, blowing at the rate of two hundred miles a min- rth last week, was heavily laden with the odor of gasoline, The scientists tell us that this is an indication that t rth is inhabited by a race of people with iron lungs and no brains, for if it were otherwise they could not breathe that kind of nut from the direction of air and liv Professor Diffenspie tain that the Earth has an atmosph , of the Martian University, is almost cer- ». He states that for ten mill a nosometer which will enable"us to smell it if dimills he can ps the wind is in the right di The great white light that is visible on the planet Earth on sum- mer nights is believed to be a Coneyile or a Witeway, showing that the inhabitants of the Earth, if there are any, have at least developed a primi- tive form of pleasure. i There have been a number of '3on the Earth planet recently, which the theorists choose to believe tobe an effort on the part of the Earth to establishcommunication with us by the use of a gigantic vanity - bag. We are not scientists ourselves, but wewish to go on record as saying that if it be true that the th people are trying anything of the sort, they must be a lot of dodgasted zaniacs, ‘The new opticon at the Martian Obs ° tory is said to bring the Earth planet 2,000,000 miles nearer. If half we hear about the folks down there is true, let us hope that any ma- chine designed to bring them all the way will be smashed before they start. A Scoot from Sat- tion, RATHER UNCONVENTIONAL. “By Jove! Miss Antiqu vn, and what alot of buttons! Won't you let n 2 1-hook urn was in town yesterday, bringing a series of photo- graphs of people alleged to live on the Earth, Nothing funnier has been seen in Mars for a long time, especi- ally the pictures of the women, who look like waste- baskets perched on the top of a rolled-up parabumber- shoot. We can scarcely believe that any such race of beings exists. : rls, who will declare they haven't a pain fairly ache to get married. A PAIR OF “ SUSPENDERS."