Judge — July 3, 1909 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘THE OLD-FASHIONED FOURTH OF JULY. HE DAWN of the Fourth—the old annual story— he nervous man’s dread and the small boy’s glory. ‘The east is yet gray when all the land rumbles, And the small cannon pops and the big cannon grumbles: And the torrid sun creeps through 4 blue haze of powder, said And the torpedoes snap and the cannons boom othe louder— and On the Fourth of July— ai The old-fashioned Fourth of July! hisdh | ‘*tha ‘The small boy’s abroad, and his breakfast for- rise gotten, “ With his long stick of punk or his smoulder- asi ing cotto And he touches off bombs and crackers and rockets, ofa And drops pinwheels in the policeman's pockets; 2) Old gentlemen swear and old ladies mutter, of P $ through his stecl-bolted shutter— you On the Fourth of July— a The old-fashioned Fourth of July! ae . i acmmeyi Pa ‘The nervous may fume and sizzle with ire, turn THE LAND OF THE FREEAND—THE HOME OF THE BRAVE." But the rocket will flare and spurt its red fire; ways . The police protest, and almost profan ITS FAULT. And the papers may plead to spend the day sanely; A But remember the days when you were a tacker, . je e set 1 eae . 7 i ina as Seal Saree tor ease eee And list to the boom of the big cannon cracker— he manager of the factory. _ ‘On the Fourth of July— answers the head designer. ‘* Here it The old-fashioned Fourth of July! He shows the manager a corset that docs not come below VICTOR A. HERMANN, , does not reduce the form to the contour of the section of stove- in short, a corset that allows its wearer to walk, sit, eat, and other- IN THE FUTURE. wise be natural, GC PAPA,” asks the small boy in the year 1 “what. It won’t do," says the manager shortly. ‘ We wouldn’t sell a was a zoo ?"" dozen of 'em in as many years. It's too sensible."” “* A 200, my son,"" explains the indulgent father, “was a place where wild animals, such as lions, tigers, ele- UNCLE'S IDEA OF NEW YORK. phants, rhinoceri and hippopotami were kept on public exhi- City nephew—" What do you think of our city, uncle 7" bition."* Rural visitor—* Bewilderin’, fairly bewilderin’. Thar ’s *) any ! Why don’t they have any zoos nowadays.”* things goin’ on before y'r eyes at one time that to me New York's just a “A man by the name of Roosevelt went to Africa and great three-ring circus !"" killed all the supply."” CAPTAIN FIBB'S FOURTH OF JULY YARN. .roun |Anyby 1 oN |the Pi comin down : wrath Burrs noe | | ome “1 to ORDER loon," i told r much It's a eollap: 1 1 wus explorin’ th 2 me way to the forbid aptures me and ties me to a be fire Asia the country wuz so bloomin den city, and fust thing | knows I wuz surround fire under me. Yep, their “Ot have a suit of clothes made outer asbestos to ed by a bunch of fierce-lookin’ chinks ! —— roast mie alive! — rocket keep me from roastin’ to death. —— reat vou fier me Loose | NO FURR! 7 THe OLO * JOR BY THE Mune T J, NEVER LET , % = Oe a sh , danc 4. — Wall, bo 5. —— Bimeby you bet they pretty q down over me face, hair of me head is fellon their faces and worshiped wis in a rug in me firep turn to throw a seare inter them heathens, so I and estically aw b heated as the flames comesa:snappin’ anda-crack- yells out that I'm old Confucius himself, and if from that infemal place’ ene lin’ all around me.— they didn’t let me loose I'd sizzle ’em to cin- Supy comicbooks.com