Judge — January 30, 1909 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

STORIES ABOUT PEOPLE NOT WANTED JUST THEN. avid James Burrell, the pastor of Marble Collegiate Church, of New ork, has a habit, in his midweek serv- +, of announcing a hymn and then giv- {the number of the same immediately iter. This habit recently caused a rile or two When he announced, “*Come, joly Spirit, Heavenly Dove," and then, vidently changing his mind as to the hymn he wished sung, he added, “Wait «ininut “BILL AND I. Simeon Ford is one of the ablest after-dinner speakers in. this country. If you don’t believe to his opening remarks as te annual dinner of the Hotel pe last time Lom was in Bost tion: peara », about a year ago. William Howard Taft appeared at the same time, We made : matched team, He weighed mo the hoof than F did, but what [lacked in rdupois T made up in mental po both did swimmingly, but 1 dis- ered that Mr. Taft drew more w: did, due possibly to the depth of his centerboard, Indeed, when the din- ner was over Twas able, owing to 1 light draft, to sail into my hotel quite castly, while Mr. Taft was unable to cross the bar, and had to anchor outside the lightship over night. ney that my sp more scholarly of the two, but 1 must Taft’s carried more weight than mine did, During my little rch was the talk on that occasi few cracks at President Roosevelt, and. the audi- with on sption, seemed al. The n was our friend, Mr. sat down ‘aft, and when his turn came he nN me—250 pounda of presi- I timber resting on you ix an aw- am roller uttered a “It is terrible to ha nc Thi will again, punctures he rise a full jot air ase ped coals of fi pt's head. [voted for him got others to go and do thesame. [like “Rig Bil? AM hotel men like bills.” WHERE POE LIVES. ‘The one hundredth anniversary of the birth of Edgar Allan Poe has revived the story of the New York paper editor who sent a young reporter to For write f deseription of I place. T th Street PREMATURE BALDNESS is most surely prevented by the maintenance of adequate nutrition the scalp. PACKER’S TAR SOAP through its special ingredients offers the surest medium for the pro- motion of normal circulation of the scalp. Applied with proper ma nipulation it aids—never supersedes Nature. Our helpful booklet, "The Value of Systematic Shampooing." tells you how Sent free on request The Packer Mfg. Co., 81 Felton St., New York. “Leannot tell how the truth may Tay the tale as “twas told to me. Third Avenue Elevated, inquired of the | agent where the home of Poe wa: He was somewhat surprised to receive the following reply: ‘I don’t know, but go downstairs to the news-stand, and there you'll find a man who sells papers to all them fellows, and he can tell you where Poe lives.”” TRICKS TO ALL TRADES. ame of William J. Lampton is well known to all Jupcr readers. Re- cently Mr. Lampton has been attracting considerable attention as the new kind of verse which he calls This vers deseribed in number of Jupce as being ch wide and ten or twelve » of this long verse of so asure is very interesting, Mr. sereat deal of work for a aper. His poetry, like Th short m Lampton does New York news, his other work, was paid for at so much the per word, The cditor conceived happy idea of saving: money by p: Mr. Lampton so much per line for his There was considerable dicker- ing over the price, but finally a com- promise was reached, whereby Mr. Lampton accepted a certain price per ‘The surprise of the newspaper editor ell be surmised when in the future mpton put only one or two words ach line of his verse, but insisted on tainly tricks in all trades. JOY WORK AND THE OTHER KIND. “r stand on a prominent ly morning hour and throngs of people on their who Did you corne at hth way to work, noting the nu forcing themselves along. because meant their daily bread, and. the erfully and eagerly pursuing use of love of their work? It isa fact that one's food has much todo with it. As an example: If an engine has poor oil, or a boiler in fired with poor coal, in, “ F it others el their way bec inti ‘Treating your stomach right is the ce keystone that sustains the arch health's. temple, and you. will {Grape-Nuts as adaily food is the most nourishing and beneficial you can use, We have thousands of testimonials real, genuine little heart-throbs— from | people who simply tried Grape-Nuts out of curiosity—-as a last resort—with th the testim result that prompte If you have never tried Grape-Nuts | it's worth while to give it a fair, im-| partial trial, Remember there are mil- lions eating Grape-Nuts every day They know, and we know, if you will use Grape-Nuts every morning your work ix more likely to be joy work, + you can keep well, and, with the I nourished, work is a joy. Road to Wellville,”” in every There's a Re SCHLEY A BIBLICAL STUDENT. —, June: cannot say tvow the truth may be Ite sted this tale frum tive Ounaha Pee Admiral Schley was going through the Core in Washing- ton, one day, showing a little girl rela- tive of his the fs tings. Stand ing befor ainting of Danicl in the Lions’ Den, the little girl noticed that on the face of Daniel there was a raphic smile, and she wondered at it. The lions looked to be hungry, and there seemed nothing to prevent them from eating him up, 80 she turned to the ad- miral and asked this question, “Why in| thor of * the world does he look so pleasant when he knows that the lions are going to eat him?” Having in mind some long-winded speeches he had listened to at banquets, the admiral replied, “He is looking pleasant, because he knows there will be no speeches after this dinner.”* A BACK.WATER TOWN. JwHGE: pes the truth kant atre far In this tale as tobd by the Washinton Star. “It was one of those sl one- ck-water towns, like Squash,"” Burton, des his the limit, A gentleman ed there the other day and wanted ircut, He found the barber sho} nd, after shaking the barber vigoroust: 1 to awaken him. “How long will it take you to cut my hair, barber?” he ask ***Not long, boss,’ said the barber. “And he rose, yawned, and sti himself, ‘Then he called upstairs to his | wife, “Hey! send the kid down to the newspaper oflice to tell the editor | want my scissors just as soon as he's done editin’ the pi ‘sa gent here waitin’ for a haircut. WHAT'S IN A TITLE? Judge Gray, of Delaware, was talking | recently about the fondness of American girls for English titles. In speaking of how empty and meaningless such foreign | titles usually were, he illustrated it with | followings: lex are just as meaningless in th HStates, Take my own tithe tl title of judge, for instance. 1 was traveling in the country a short time ayo, and, at the table of the hotel where ing, there wax a man whor pre: ‘When this judge got up and went , LE said to the man sitting next him at the table, ‘Is the gentleman who just left a United States judge or a local | judge?’ He is a local judge, sir,’ was the reply. ‘He was a judge at a horse race last week." ‘Titles at home and abroad amount to ahout the sume thing. Nothing counts but the man.” Just wet the brush: out Berset the size of a be: and lather up. ,, Berset Shaving Cream Soap is the ideal latherer— it is antiseptic and con- tains no free Alkali to smart, dry and pucker the skin. Composed of Glyc- erine and Cocoanut Oil, it is rightly called The Healing Lather. BERSET Shaving Cream Soap softens the beard so perfectly that the razor (properly stropped) never scrapes or pulls—it permits a cleaner shave than ordinary lathers because it lies closer to the skin. No more chapped faces in cold weather—Berset keeps your skin soft and smooth. Berset contains nothing injurious to either face or brush—ordinary alkaline soaps al i to both, Berset Shaving p is the most sari- tary, most comfortable lathering More conve IF mug, ON ‘THE Agent—* Say, old man, I'd like to have you take a look at this ec encyclopedia I have here. Unde Josh buyin’ newfangled contraptions, and 1 don'ts’ Waal, | reckon “twoulda't doy ROAD. puch of a hand at J thing if P had it.’ ood, I J ride the ¢ nse 1 co comicbooks.com