Judge, 1908-12-12 · page 5 of 16
Judge — December 12, 1908 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct sections: **"Kisses" poem** (top left): A lighthearted Victorian-era verse about kissing and microbes, reflecting early 20th-century fascination with germ theory as a social concern. **"In Pigland" cartoon** (top right): A pig woman complains to a male pig about getting dirty while bathing—likely a humorous anthropomorphic domestic scene with no clear political reference. **"From the Book Agents' Bazoo"**: Satirical commentary mocking door-to-door book salesmen's pitches and their aggressive tactics. **"The Same Old Story" comic strip** (bottom): A six-panel sequence showing a man repeatedly getting into trouble with his wife—apparently freezing outside, receiving poor advice, and suffering consequences. It's a domestic comedy strip with no specific political content, just relatable married-life humor typical of Judge's satirical entertainment.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
KISSES. 73 KISS!” 1 sued. ‘Oh, lips like thine ses are no stranger !"” “Indeed,” she said, ‘ must I decline— The savants speak of dange But things microbic, by the s Such as staphyllococei !"” * Dear maid,’ I prayed, “ be not afraid, Nor stand for segregation. Those microbe things may be allayed Through thorough vaccination. * And if we kiss, and kiss By microbes thus freque We'll wax immune!” And straightway then She blushingly consented. And so we kissed and kissed With kisses piled on kisse I'm sure "twere Such blissfuln It? Ab, me! Ah, my! finished not our sitting, For now the (We fear) in too soon quitting. howIN t. SARIN, pardy may lie Miss Pighe—* Mati dirty by bathing in IN PIG . just look at that mud! How do you expect me to get nice and an stuff FROM THE BOOK AGENTS’ BAZOO. HE BEST preventive against the bite of a bull terrier is a two- T inch strip of tough hickory worn over the threatened parts. A rusty nail inserted in the board may result in broken teeth for ‘Towser, and thus tend to enhance the livableness of life for the next distributer of literature. The point of a No, 9 shoe thrust just above the threshold next to the door-jamb will often prevent the closing of the door until you can get to the six hundred and nine rules for becoming wealthy out of the scraps saved from the dinner table, thus insuring a sale. Don't give up at the twenty-ninth time the goodwife says, “I tell you positively once and for all that I do not want ‘ The Life and Times of Sarah Axheaver, the Murderess of La Porte.’"’ Think of the life-insurance agents and the little boys who sell one hundred and forty-four pac! of bluing to win a stationary tin engine. Don't fail to show the women plenty of pictures, A striking cand Rebekah at the well is often more effect- representation of Ist ‘THE SAME ive than the table of the heights of the various cliffs from which famous lovers have committed suicide by leaping. If the parlor contains an embroidered text, ‘God Bless Our Home," a cabinet organ, and a red plush album, try ‘ Father, Fire- side, and the Firmament of Bliss; or Pearls of Precious Promise."* If, on the other hand, there is a Gibson picture, a piano player, and a glass vase covered with cigar bands, it is up to you to sell “* Vani- of Vanity Fair; or Shocking Disclosures of Life among the Smart Set A Prince Albert coat, while rather inclined to catch when leap- is very useful in hiding the patches necessary after conflicts with non-reading dogs. Greasy d 3 may be removed by the application of attar of roses, To discover how to obtain enough money to buy the attar of roses, r the one thousand and one rules for becoming a captain of industry, in the appendix of your Golden Treasury book. STUAKT B, STONE, OLD STORY. 1“ Noovercoat for me. I'll keep warm walking.” 4 “I'm frozen stiff!” 5. “ Ouch, my toe!” comicbooks.com