Judge — March 28, 1908 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

GOT WHAT HE COULD. HE GREAT specialist’s patient, after many weeks of treatment, had at last been de: clared cured of an “incurable” disease, and with a grateful feeling he asked the physic the amount of his bill “That depends, my dear sir,” said the special ist. “Whonever I treat a man [always make it a point to determine his occupation and how large & nT make out my family he has to support. Lill accordingly. May Task what you do for a liv “Tam a poet,” replied the patient soulfully. “In that ” said the physician, “if you will give me the money in cash now, it'll be a dollar and a half.” ‘THE FOOD OF LOVE. Murray Hill—Do you know how to cure a 1t wuz de swellest dance Lever.attended.** LOCATED. A FEW FACTS. HE child who 6 OU SAY i that the cried for an VV hour didn't Y cook as | saulted you?" in get it. Sulphur springs quired the judge. “He did—kick ed me, your honor.” “Where did he kick you?” “In the pantry.” SS are the best places for match-making kpockets nev er suceced till they get their hands in. Pawnbrokers prefer patrons with WHOLE TRUTH. Witness—"1 saw no redeeming qual a man with one eye named Wilkin Corkscrews have sunk more people Lawyer —“ What > than cork jackets will was the name of the | sav other cye?”” The sluggard is referred to the ant, T was rush-hour but he goes to his | in the subway. uncle. Martin Luther All that is req hung wearily from a uisite in the enjoy- SHES CRUSTEDYHIM strap. “Here stand ment of love or sau- Mrs, Casey —"* Shure, Dr. Mack, ye did so well by Felix, takin’ out his appindex, Oi've brought 1,” he said. “God sages fs confidence see alnent turgcon—** Well, and what scems to be the matter with him?" help me, Lean dono ' A little sighing, Mrs. Cascy—"* Dandrutf, sor.” otherwise.” alittle erying, a little dying and a great deal of lying constitute love. \ A man is sometimes in a in that condition. vance of his age, but you never heard of a woman HEARD EVERY SPRING. W' RE, you fellers goin’? " 1 up by noon." ot tut. much work to-t Je work here after y vt bitin’, anywa just right i Wouldn't cateh atin 'f “We'll have a devil of a pi “Where'll L meet you fell ‘ te Art’s pice. Dr A SELF-ANSWERING CONUNDRUM. és“ HAT is the difference,” asks our friend, “between the men who crowd a theatre to see the ballet and the “And the answer?” we inquire Hotl clerk (an “AIL the girls look alike and all the Downd'Huyioe— : up a quieter tavern, A FINISHED ANIMAL PAINTER men like a look.” whee mith all thet th ee BALKED AT ‘THE BUBBL 1s on the stage 2” cidvilled ‘W have ter hunt tricklin’ an’ splashin’ goin’ on.” comicbooks.com