Judge — September 14, 1907 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

GONE, BUT NOT FORGOTTEN. HE rural mail- carrier looked at his watch and saw that he had some time to spare, and he drew up at the gate of a farm- house, in front of which sat an old farmer smoking a corn-cob pipe and wearing a sad ex- pression on his face. “TL suppose, Bil, you're mighty glad the summer boarders have all gone,” remarked the carrier as he settled back in his cart’ “Wa-al, I dunno ‘bout thet,” was the reply. “You don't? Why, it always struck me you was mighty glad to get them city folks off the farm,” “Yep; I—I reckon I wuz.” “Only last spring you was tellin’ how they broke down fences, ruined apple-trees, and smashed croquet-mal- lets.” “Yep; them’s the very words I used.” “And yet you ain't glad they've gone, eh?” “Wa-al, no, Tom; I somehow ain't. It’s bin mighty lonesome since they went, to tell the truth,” + Lonesome? You don’t mean it “Yep, We never had no sich sum- mer boarders here afore, as I kin re- member, There wuz thet Mr. and Mrs. Blankley from Brooklyn. By gum! but the way she tore into him mornin’, noon an’ night kept us so excited thet the time fairly flew. Then there wuz thet young couple from Staten Island, They spooned so much they didn’t hear the dinner-bell half the time. Gosh! but they wuz a circus, an'I bet I got forty meals the best of ‘em. They wuz so much in love they couldn't eat. An’ the widder from Nyack, who set her cap fer a feller from Yonkers. By gum! but she kept me an’ the old woman laughin’ till we could hardly do our work." Did she git him, Bill?" **She landed him, Tom, a day or two afore he went, an’ she wuz so tickled thet she had the blind staggers, an’ we had to rub her tem- ples with hoss-linament.” UNCLE'S QUANDARY. Mrs. pe Mann Hatran—' How do you like my new dinner-gown, uncle?" Mr. Ditton Noyes—“' Very choice, Belle. tuck your napkin?” health.” ‘Many scraps among the boarders this year, Bill?" “Scraps or sunthin’ else goin’ on all the time, an’ I never put in sich a grand summer. By gum! you orter bin here the day the feller from Hoboken thrashed the feller from Al- bany in a game o' croquet. I let a hull day's plowin’ go an’ hung around, expectin’ ‘em to go at it ag'in; but the Albany feller had had all he wanted. I put two dollars on his board-bill to pay me fer the time I lost. Do you s'pose, Tom, I could keep winter boarders 2” “No. Them city folks LOVE IS BLIND—AND DEAF! So that's a dinner-gown, eh? H'm! Where do you is too blamed busy sellin’ gold-bricks in winter to think about their “Yep; I s'pose they be. “ Wa-al, I'll hev to go out an’ pick a fuss with the hired man, or I'll git so blue I'll sell the farm an’ move to the city. Snakes! hull dollar to see a circu: “ Well, good-bye, Bil said the rural mail-carrier as he took up the reins again. “Good-bye to you, Tom. If you meet anyone thet is lookin’ fer a farm cheap you might send him around.” “Oh, cheer up, Bill, and you'll be all right ina day or two.” But a tear trickled down the old farmer's face as he arose and started to- ward the barn, a.a uawis, QUANTITY of ‘hot air,” ‘Sweetened to the taste, Will always win the maiden With the wasp-like waist comicbooks.com