Judge — May 18, 1907 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A REPLY FOR AMA- ZETTE. 4s VES, Amazette; the la- dies’ magazines are within their rights in stat- ing that it is the proper thing, and a very dainty fashion, for every woman to select. her perfumery and strive to individualize her- self by the evanescent fr grance that drifts along in the whispering breezes in her vicinity. Nobody has any objections to the gen- tlest suspicion of new-mown hay, or violets, or rosebuds, or honeysuckle, when a pret- ty woman comes around. Not a bit of it. A pretty woman suggests buds and blossoms and birds singing in the trees, and nodding flowers, and so on, and the prettier she is, and the moré she suggests these things, the better she makes the world. But a good thing may be carried to extremes. No woman has a right to emphasize her individuality by sloshing jockey-club or musk on her handkerchief as though she had poured it from a sprinkling-can or had connected the garden-hose with a tank of it and turned the nozzle on herself. Some women do that, We don’t say you do that, Amazette ; we don’t even hint that you might do it. We simply y that there are some who do, THEY'LL ALL WANT APPLES. “So de kid hit yer in de eye, did he? Well, give him dis apple an’ he'll feel sorry.” “Then all the other boys will hit me in the eye.” JUDGE'S FAVORITES. MARION VOOS, WITH WEBER'S THEATRE COMPANY. The evening star, whose lovely rays Throw in the shade the garish blaze Of ail the lesser lights of earth, Is fittest symbol of your mirth. A REPROOF. $6 PID you not have your nails polished by a blond lady on Tuesday morning 2” asked the attorney. “T decline to answer,” said the witness. “Did you not have your hands massaged by the same blond lady Wednesday after- noon ?" persisted the lawyer. I decline to answer,” again said the witness. + Did you not have your nails polished by the same blond lady on Thursday?” inquired the lawyer. +1 decline to answer,” de- clared the witness once more. ++ But why do you refuse to answer ?” interposed the court. REMINISCING. Veteran mascor (of the 71st Regiment)—"' Well, well! Dat wuz de last chromo made uv meself before | left New York wid me regiment ter lick de Spaniards.” d they are as conspicuous as an automobile when they go along the street—but there is a whole horizon of difference between be- ing conspicuous and having an individuality, Don't soak up the perfume to such an extent that a cold in the head will be a blessing to any one in your vicinity.” A DIAMOND COMPOSER. A COMPOSER of op'ras galore Went broke for a twelvemonth or more ; But he’s now struck it rich With the baseball team which Employs him to write out the score. + Because he asks too manicurious questions,” stated the witness, and immediately falls from the chair in a faint. A MORNING RAMBLE. “Yes, my dear; there is nothing as bracing as an early-morning walk in the park. A HARD TASK. Parson John- son—"" Why is it Inever see you at church, Samuel ?” Sam Possum— + Wa-al, pahson, Ah nebah likes ter work on a Sun- day, an’ it am aw- ful hahd work fo" me ter keep awake while yo’ am preachin’.” TRUE. HE. fellow who stops to ex- plain everything to everybody will never reach the end of his jour- “ney. A PERPETUAL LEASE. “ Hendrick, vas you efer in lofe?" “Oh, Katrina! mein troubles vas pecause | vas nefer ould ohf lofe."* comicbooks.com