Judge — December 22, 1906 — page 35: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

RAGINGS OF A RASH ROUNDER. MONEY makes the mare go. Pithy sayings are likely to be crushed on the editor's desk.* The director is kuown by the stock com- pany he keeps. A bad brake has caused many a railroad accident ; it is always a bad break to step upon a lady's train, The night editor is on his landlady’s after- noon calling list. Never ask a woman her age. think your intersions are serious. She who keeps friends with her cook may keep friends with her friends. The more chaste the less speed. Said the physician, + Suffer, little children, and come unto me.” Bores augur holes in a company. The divorce statutes are knot-holes in the law. Sometimes the matrimonial knot is a slip-noose, adjusted in the usual place. There are men who never blow their own horns, but they are Like enough they have motors for the work. She will be She may not, necessarily, modest. Never tell a good story to a woman with bad teeth, afraid to laugh at it. There is much difference between the man who is not able and his brother who is notable. EDWARD MARSHALL. A LONG FAREWELL. 66 AND now, love, a long farewell!” Thus he said to lovely Nell. Though the fact to both was plain ‘That next night he'd come again. But he had so much to tell "Twas indeed a long farewell, Though it seemed no so to them—- Ten p. m. till two a.m. cronce nixpseye, AN NN NX AQ FSS WIGS. Se THE LIMIT. NE moment,” begs the man with the wan and weary eyes, inter- rupting the man with the expression of mingled worry and satisfaction. “I have listened patiently while you told me of the time that your own cousin skinned you on a mining deal, haven't 1?” “You have. And do you know, he also “But And I listened with apparent interest while you told me how your best friend turned you down at a time you needed him most, and how your new stucco house had holes poked through the walls, and how you suffered arid suffered with the toothache brought y standing in the rain at the station, waiting for your wife’s second cousin by marriage; and I never murmured while you told me about getting short-weight coal, and how your doctor overcharged you, and how you were perplexed over your financial troubles, and how you felt that you were about to have appendicitis ?” Yes." “But I want you distinctly to understand that I won't hearken to any lost-golf-ball or broken-auto stories. Now go ahead if you have any more troubles.” FAMILIAR CELEBRATIONS. MEMBER (hic), my dear,” said Lushleigh suddenly and he was contronted by his wit Chris’mas comes (hic) but onch a year.” “This is not Christmas! You area sight !" exclaimed the pro- voked Mrs. Lushleigh. “Well, the Fourth of (hic) July comes but "—— + This is not the Fourth “Wash’ton’s birthday, then ber, comes "—— “ This is not Washington's birthday New Year's, New Year's comes "—— «It is not New Year's. Come in this instant !” “Then it mush be (hic) Thanksgiving,” sighed Lushleigh, as he sank intoa chair in the hall, “I knew I'd strike it if I jus’ (hi severed. Remember, my dear, that it only comes onch a year an’ don't fuss.” oe s the door opened * remember that “cs Wash'ton’s birthday (hic), remem- jon TRUE. THE APPARITION. Has yo" evah seen a ghost, uncle?” Ya-as, chil’; Ah suttenly has."* What did he look like, uncle ?"* Lime ‘Rastus Uncte Esen— Lime ‘Rastus: ‘Uncie Esen—' chickens he had undah hees arm!" Waal, it was a coal-black night, an it was de ghost ob a coal-black nigger, an’ so Ah couldn't see nuffin’ “cept two white comicbooks.com