Judge, 1906-08-25 · page 6 of 16
Judge — August 25, 1906 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains satirical commentary typical of early 20th-century American humor. The "Chaphorisms" section offers cynical observations on human nature—money can't buy happiness but can buy pants; those who save worry experience least in the end. The cartoons mock contemporary life: "No Butts" satirizes moral hypocrisy (a missionary lecturing a newsboy about cigarettes while ignoring larger issues); "Good Proof" jokes that a man enjoying vacation means his wife stayed home; "Defined" plays on a child's literalist misreading of "mite" in biblical context. The large central cartoon "The Transatlantic Pest in Year 2000" depicts futuristic airships, suggesting anxieties about technological change and transatlantic commerce. "Man the Boat" presents gender commentary through women discussing needing male assistance while rowing. The final exchange about Irish druggists and snakes appears to reference Prohibition-era smuggling jokes, playing on Ireland's reputation and America's alcohol ban.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
CHAPHORISMS, A FELLOW failing makes us wondrous blind. Those who live in glass houses should nev- er throw fits. Many a man, start- ing out to nail a lie, has bruised his fingers, It is a curious fact that he who saves most worry will have least in the end. A cynic is one who would fall off the pio- nacle of joy and make his nose bleed. Money will not buy happiness, but it will buy pants ; and it is hard for most men to be happy if they haven't any pants. TOO TRUE. Dyer—" Poor Hig- bee has got to start life anew." . Ryer. ‘What's the matter ?” Dyer—« He has just returned from his vaca- tion.” HE SEEMS TO HAVE ONE. S46 LJAS your boy an ear for music? “1 think he must have. A hopeless ex- pression always over- spreads his countenance when my wife sings.” THE WORLD EASILY BEATEN. ‘ A D now, children,” said the teacher, **do you know that there THE TRANSATLANTIC PEST IN THE YEAR 2000. Air-suip_sxiprer—' Hey, captain! give us a tow into New York. Part of our steering-gear fell overboard."” is a revolution of the world every day ?” “+I believe so?” “Huh!” replied little Arthur. Central America has it beaten *: Then how do the drugyists get along in the prohibition districts to death,” over there ?” MAN THE BOAT. Tue oimt at THe OAR—" My! how rough the water is!_ | wish we had a man along.” Tue orwer cimt—" Don't you think It would be better if we had two?” NO BUTTS. HE kind old gentle- man with a bundle of missionary leaflets un- der his arm stopped a moment in the street for the purpose of adminis- tering a stinging rebuke to the newsboy smoking a cigarette. Young man," he said in tones of terrible intensity, «throw that cigarette awa} “Ah, g'wan!" re- plied the newsboy con- temptuously. ++ Buy one uy yer own GOOD PROOF. City editor—“ You say that this man is ‘en- joying a vacation,’ ete. How do you know that he is * enjoying * it?" Reporter—« Be- cause his wife didn’t go with him.” DEFINED. #6 OW, children,” said an enthusiastic teacher, “Johnnie has spelled + mite’ correctly and told us that it is a very small object. Can any little boy remember where mite is mentioned in the Bible?” One small hand was raised and a small voice said, “The pen is mite- ier than the sword.” A POOR COUNTRY FOR DRUGGISTS. oe Is IT a fact that there are no snakes in Ireland?” comicbooks.com