Judge, 1906-07-07 · page 7 of 16
Judge — July 7, 1906 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a satirical commentary on American Independence Day celebrations, likely from the early 1900s. The top cartoon depicts a chaotic Fourth of July celebration where a politician reads the Declaration of Independence to crowds, but the scene devolves into anarchic violence and mayhem—suggesting the gap between American ideals and reality. The surrounding verse and anecdotes mock the holiday's dangers: firecracker injuries ("A thumb on the hand is worth two in the alcohol"), drunk behavior, and child accidents. The term "Nigger-Chasers" refers to a type of small explosive firecracker popular at the time. The final section satirizes American capitalism: a wealthy "trust magnate" boasts that his son, given five dollars for fireworks, hasn't spent it—showing nascent business sense. The joke critiques both wealthy financiers and the corruption of childhood innocence through capitalist values, while the overall page suggests Independence Day celebrations embodied America's chaotic contradictions between noble rhetoric and violent, drunken reality.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
PUBLIC LIBRARY, ROW ©. RATOR \ WiLL READ THE DECLARATION OF INDE PENDENCE] r No D'D0. é ano SOEAK ON THE SAME ALL 6000 CITIZENS, wi FOURTH oF VULY ON THE Warer! A FREE-FOR-ALL. The day of perfect independence; or, the modern Declaration of Independence. “ NIGGER-CHASERS.” THE BRIGHT SIDE. TIS not all punk that blisters, OW doth the bobtailed dog remark A wet Fourth makes a lean graveyard. The worth of nature's plans The fool and his digits are soon parted. When to his ears there come the bark The sticks fall alike on the just and the And yelp of curs that are the mark } unjust. For fire-crackers and cans. Y >) A thumb on the hand is worth two in YF the alcohol. It is better to take a dare than to get your hand scorched. The boy who doesn’t get too gay may <2 celebrate another day. It isn’t always the fire-cracker with the longest fuse that makes the most noise. Remember that the giant fire-cracker is always just getting ready to go off when you bend over it to see what is the matter. Let us then be up and shooting, with a heart for any fate, lighting fuses and then scooting—learn to stand aside and wait. FATE. FAR from the madding crowd's ignoble strife He with his loved ones planned to spend the day. Alas! his sweet child almost lost his life By falling head first from a load of hay. A FUTURE FINANCIER. 66 AH !" said the trust magnate, «I'm proud of that boy of mine. He's going to turn out all right. I have sometimes feared that he would never develop an idea of business, but I've wronged him. I gave him five dollars to spend on fireworks and he hasn't bought a solitary explosive.” «That certainly is wonderful. Has he decided to put the mon=~ in the bank?” — f comicbooks.com