Judge, 1906-06-09 · page 7 of 16
Judge — June 9, 1906 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple unrelated satirical items typical of Judge magazine's format: **"At Last"** (top): A couple in a rowboat; the woman announces she's "hooked something at last"—a double entendre joke about fishing and marriage. **"Something of a Puzzle"** and **"Exactly"**: Two separate teacher-student dialogues mocking ignorance and pretension in education. **"How Bankhead Downed Hobson"**: References a real congressional race between Richmond P. Hobson and John Hollis Bankhead (likely early 1900s, unclear which election). The story illustrates Bankhead's campaign tactic: he claimed Hobson was seen "washing with the women," implying impropriety or unmanly behavior. This succeeded in turning rural voters against Hobson—satirizing how voters could be swayed by character attacks rather than policy. **"How Selfish"** and **"Legally Advised"**: Brief joke items about divorce and burglary, typical filler humor. The page exemplifies Judge's mix of political commentary, social satire, and light humor aimed at educated readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
3 ConA ene Oa Sue—"' | think, dearest, I've hooked something at last." SOMETHING OF A PUZZLE. HOW BANKHEAD DOWNED HOBSON. HE novice went to the successful literary man in all humility. He THE story is told that during the first campaign in which Richmond had had just enough practical experience to appreciate that he did P. Hobson and Bankhead ran for congress the latter had to resort to various mental gym- nastics to defeat the hero. Bankhead was speaking one day in a district miles and miles from a railroad. Noth- ing that he could say of the political and profes- sional shortcomings of his opponent seemed to affect the audience—they were plainly lined up for Hobson. But an inspi- ration suddenly came to him. * And what do you think?" says he.“ My handsome opponent goes in washing with the wo- men! Yes, sir; inwash- : by ing with the women! EXACTLY. t/ , F = , Ef Didn't Use him with my Teacher —“ Now, i i Zag ‘own eyes coming out of f the water with a Boston not know it all. “I have come to VOI Hh ity you,” he said, “to learn | how to write books.” BY y ‘ { I 1] “My dear young CA h Vo: 4 man,” replied the other, «that is no trick at all. The thing to learn is how to secure publica- tion." «Well, then, how is publication secured 2” «Why, as to that,” was the reply, ‘when I think of some of the books that I have tried to read lately I'll have to admit that I'll be hanged if [ know. It's too much of a puzzle for me. Robert, do you know what an isosceles trian- girl on one arm and a gle is?" New York girl on the + Boy—"Yes'm.” a \) UA other? No, fellow-states- Teacher —“ Well, Nh Hf} men; you don't want what is it? < 7 A Y SS | I such aman as that rep- Boy—*It's one uv : = L | resenting you in th dem ings I gits licked ae 4 . ‘4 United States congress.” fer not knowin" wot = : ; And they didn’t. it is.” LEGALLY ADVISED, First burglar— «Did Bill git much out uv dat last burglary 2" Second burglar— “No. He got so little dat his lawyer advised him ter plead guilty.” NO! Millionaire— The dealer sold me this «old master’ very cheap.” Friend —* Because he knew you, I suppose?” flow SELFISH! Millionaire—«Gad, Etoerty taoy—"'There goes Bob Jones, who is bitterly contesting his wife's divorce no! Because he didn’t.” proceedings. Such a selfish man as that has no business getting married." comicbooks.com