Judge, 1906-03-24 · page 6 of 16
Judge — March 24, 1906 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes the pretentious excesses of Gilded Age American society, particularly the obsession with European titles and marriages of convenience. **"The Duke and the Ducats"** is the main satire: An American millionaire's spoiled daughter, Gwendolen, demands her father buy her a dukedom by paying a British duke 2.25 million dollars to marry her. The satire targets wealthy Americans' desperation to acquire European aristocratic status through financial transactions, essentially purchasing nobility. The daughter's initial selfishness—willing to bankrupt her family for a coronet—contrasts with her sudden "noble" suggestion that the duke live off her parents' support instead, revealing her shallow reasoning persists beneath momentary sentiment. **"A Ballade of Spring Poets"** mocks the predictable, overwrought nature poetry that floods publications each spring—"soul-burdened poets" churning out clichéd verse about moonlight, flowers, and nightingales. The smaller jokes ("An Insult," "Girls Will Be Girls," "Sartorial Sallies") are brief social observations about contemporary manners. Overall: satire of American wealth-worship and European social climbing.
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A BALLADE OF SPRING POETS. ypalescent moon, urse, of the flowers that te hw the busy bardlings croon ! urmur of hill and glen Of ¢ won f (Ob, my! They And freely | 1a, peets of spring will s« | a precious boon, ‘The azure sky i The stars e’er come And wh (I'm sure there are many poets made). Without the bee and the grassy blade? patters like these his soul seduce ; Yes, trifles like these his feelings raid Ho, poets of spring will soon run loose! would he The poets of spring will gurgle soon, Suul-burdened poets of every shade ; They'll deal out things with a liberal spoon, New aspirations will be displayed, ‘ew flights of fancy will be essayed. with rank abuse, t evade— Though Pegasus 1 galling Ho, poets of spring will se spur he ca n run louse! mV There's no way out of it, I'm afraid ; You cannot down them by any ruse. renade— Prince, welcome the coming Ho, poets of spring will soon run loose t NATHAN at. LEVY. THE DUKE AND THE DUCATS. (Extract from an unpultished novel.) 66 RUT I cannot afford it, Gwendolen,” Mr. Mortimer protested. Gwendolen Mortimer, the spoiled beauty, pouted. A pout on those lips was like an unblossomed rose. + Why not, papa ?” she urged, coaxing him with soft caresses. ** You never denied me anything. Why this ?” + Because, as I told you, | cannot afford it.” *Oh, papa!” she playfully caroled, + you say you cannot afford it, and yet you are a millionaire—an Ame millionair That may be, Gwen "—he blushed with pleasure at the admission—* but even they have their limita- tions.” A faint shadow darkened her fair face. ++ They should not have, papa, when the daughter of one of them may be the Duchess of Bu leigh,” she said with the gleam of the cor- onet in her eyes. Mortimer kissed his daughter. “1 understand that, dear,” he said very gently; ** but the duke asks two mil- lions and a quarter for his title.” + And you won't give that much for your only child's sake? Oh, And Gwendolen Mor- timer sobbed. Mr. Mortimer becoming uncomfortable, He loved his daughter, and love to him meant sacrifice; but dence stood between him and the altar. papa!" was very pru- “It would leave your mother and me absolutely penniless, Gwendolen,” he said, _ «There would be nothing left for our AN INSULT. “ It's au cutrage.” Said Parasol Sis, “To be put In a rack With a masher like this."" A NOVICE. "Is Grace very much in love ?”* “Terribly. Her first affair, you know.” support, and we would be beggars. You would hardly ask such a sacrifice, dear, would you 2” he pleaded with her. Gwendolen, humored as she had always been, was not utterly selfish. She had thought only of being a duchess, not what would be the cost. Now she was confronted with the hard reality. Her nobler nature was calling from the wilderness of-her whims, Should she or should she heed it not and gain the dearest wish of Her father tensely watched the struggle. Sud- She listen and lose, her woman's heart? denly her face shone as if a ray from heaven had kissed her. threw her arms about her father’s neck. *:Oh, papa! she cried, mamma can live with us! I'm sure Burleigh would be only too glad He is so generous, papa! Mr. Mortimer unlocked his daughter's arms from about his neck “I know the answer now. You and and rose wearily to his feet. The way into it was not yet clear to him Again the pretty pout puffed the lip of Gwendolen, not yet Du ess of Burleigh. WrLLsast 9. LAM GIRLS WILL BE GIRLS. Agnes—" Ag Pandora— is making sheep's-eyes at me.” Talways thought him a muttonhea SARTORIAL SALLIES. SOYVJHY is it?” asked the thin man, «that the vested interests’? Why not + “They are,” replied the fat man, + but whitewash. Of course that garment excites unpleasant public dis- cussion, so it’s always covered with a cloak of respectability.” How about trousers 2” grinned the thin man. No difficulty there,” said the fat man quickly. ests never lose control of the national pantry.” TOO PERSONAL. NEVER call my fellow-man an But that [ blush and turn me from the glass. are always spoken of as + ed interests *? 's usually a coat of * + Vested inter-